Transcript
[0:04] Hey everybody, welcome to the 10%
[0:06] Happier Podcast. I'm Dan Harris. As many
[0:08] of you know, I am obsessed with
[0:10] Buddhism, aka the Dharma. And uh one of
[0:14] my favorite ways to uh uh practice and
[0:18] learn the dharma is through pathy little
[0:21] catchphrases. These little mantras,
[0:23] these, as I like to call them, Buddhist
[0:25] earworms that weasel their way into your
[0:28] mind stream and then surface uh at
[0:31] exactly the moments when you need them.
[0:33] We've done many episodes on this show
[0:34] where we uh talk to my uh longtime
[0:37] meditation teacher, Joseph Goldstein,
[0:39] about the many Buddhist earworms that he
[0:42] has personally uh coined. However, he's
[0:46] not the only meditation maestro who uses
[0:49] uh pathy little phrases. Uh another
[0:51] person who has done so is the legendary
[0:54] Zen master Ticknot Han. uh Tikknathhan
[0:57] uh died uh a few years ago, but he was
[1:00] as I said a Zen master from Vietnam uh
[1:03] the author of many many books and the
[1:05] man who started uh the well-known Plum
[1:07] Village lineage of Buddhist meditators.
[1:11] Uh and today we've got two of
[1:13] Tiknadhan's senior students here to talk
[1:16] about um some of uh their favorite top
[1:19] 10 phrases from Tiknadhan. My guests are
[1:23] uh Brother Fap Young and Kyra Jewel
[1:26] Lingo, both of whom have been on this
[1:28] show uh several times and they're both
[1:30] amazing. Kyra Juul Lingo, Brother Fap
[1:32] Young, welcome to both of you. Welcome
[1:35] back.
[1:35] >> Thank you. Happy to be back.
[1:38] >> Yes, always good to be with you.
[1:40] >> Well, Kyra Juel, let me just start with
[1:41] you. Um, so Tiknadhan, as I understand
[1:45] it, um, coined a lot of these little
[1:48] phrases that are are great ways of of
[1:50] teaching the dharma. Um, and he often
[1:53] did so using calligraphy. So c can you
[1:56] just give us some background on on these
[1:59] phrases and how he came up with them and
[2:00] how he taught with them? So, you know,
[2:03] this is a classic kind of um activity
[2:06] for a Zen master to uh and for, you
[2:10] know, a Zen practitioner uh to um have a
[2:14] brush and to have ink and to have some
[2:17] rice paper and to create um an art form
[2:22] on that paper that supports people in
[2:25] their practice that captures some
[2:27] essence of of the dharma so that it's
[2:31] It's up, it's in your eyesight, and you
[2:33] remember to practice. So, it's really a
[2:36] um a reminder, right, of who we are, of
[2:40] what we are, of why we practice, of how
[2:42] we can be awake in every moment. And so
[2:46] these um calligraphies of Tay really
[2:50] came from his own heart and his own you
[2:53] know seeing of what you know what things
[2:57] people needed to be reminded of. But
[2:59] also they would come you know he would
[3:01] say something in a talk that people
[3:03] would really like and then they would
[3:05] say can you make a calligraphy of that
[3:06] for for us or can you help us you know
[3:10] remember that teaching by putting so he
[3:12] he generated some of the phrases other
[3:15] people kind of said you know we need
[3:17] this as a calligraphy. So it was a very
[3:20] organic and very um communitydriven
[3:24] process. And then then there were all
[3:26] the translations in all the different
[3:28] languages. So he was doing calligraphy
[3:31] in Chinese and in Sino Vietnamese and
[3:34] Vietnamese and English and French and
[3:36] Dutch and German and um Spanish and
[3:39] Portuguese. So wherever people, you
[3:42] know, were that um that were students of
[3:45] his or that practiced in his uh
[3:47] tradition, he would he would make
[3:49] translations as well. Brother Fabyung, I
[3:52] want to say a few words and and see if
[3:53] you agree with me. Um one of the
[3:56] questions I get uh frequently from
[3:59] people who listen to me or subscribe to
[4:01] my stuff is
[4:03] why do I need to hear the same thing
[4:06] over and over again? Um, and I often
[4:09] remind people uh that one of the
[4:11] original translations of the word sati,
[4:14] which we now translate as mindfulness,
[4:16] is remembering. Um, there's just
[4:19] something about the human mind, the
[4:22] human brain, where we can hear
[4:25] something very inspirational on social
[4:27] media, in a podcast, in a book, and then
[4:29] we just forget it. And so remembering
[4:32] seems to me to be the name of the game.
[4:35] Would you agree with that? Yeah, you
[4:37] know that's true about uh remembering
[4:40] recollecting is another uh uh for
[4:42] meditation and uh it's also in uh Zen
[4:46] Buddhism there's also uh uh an emphasis
[4:49] to protect our beginner's mind so
[4:52] refreshing
[4:54] refreshing reviving it's like a human
[4:57] nature to become like uh complacent and
[5:00] like you know one time Tai came to the
[5:02] deer park and we walked around the first
[5:05] day he arrived here from France and he
[5:08] went into the meditation hall the D and
[5:10] then he saw these calligraphies that has
[5:12] been up there for like you know 5 years
[5:14] 6 years and said take those down and
[5:18] replace them with new ones
[5:21] and you know and the dining hall does
[5:24] the same and then you know I'm walking
[5:25] out and he's like go do it now
[5:29] so it's just like you know it's like you
[5:31] have a a sign a calligraphy up but like
[5:34] if it's there and it's always there. You
[5:36] just don't see it anymore. So, not only
[5:39] with our practice and so on, but
[5:42] particularly with his calligraphies or
[5:44] any practice, it becomes kind of like uh
[5:48] I don't know like n uh I don't know how
[5:51] what else to say but that I I
[5:53] experienced that. So the the
[5:56] calligraphies help us remind us and his
[5:59] domat talks he's constantly talking
[6:01] about breathing the breath and it's like
[6:03] almost like the same talk every time and
[6:06] people always say oh why does he keep
[6:08] teaching that it's because we hear it we
[6:12] love novelty it's like oh something new
[6:14] and it triggers us but actually the
[6:17] diligence and discipline is actually
[6:19] keeping it fresh and revived and new. So
[6:24] sometime meditation you go to sitting
[6:26] and you know it it just just no there's
[6:29] no life to it no life energy. So so our
[6:32] practice with these calligraphies when
[6:34] we see it is to remind us and come back
[6:37] to our breath and then uh enliven it
[6:40] again what it meant for you or what that
[6:43] teaching is. So, and that's personal,
[6:47] you know, you you don't know who was
[6:48] doing it or not. You need to know if
[6:51] it's like no longer working.
[6:54] Nobody can tell you. No, no teacher can
[6:56] tell you. And so, you have to uh have
[6:59] that motivation to know when there's no
[7:02] life in it. There's no substance. You
[7:04] just it's form. And that's, you know,
[7:08] that's usually the the weakness of
[7:10] humans. We we love the form but like
[7:12] it's the really essence.
[7:16] So the calligraphies kind of help with
[7:18] that but you know once in a while you
[7:20] got to change it because it becomes like
[7:22] your calendar. You don't see it anymore
[7:24] or like your favorite picture until a
[7:27] friend comes by. It's like oh my god
[7:28] look at that beautiful calligraphy or
[7:31] that painting in your wall. And then
[7:33] you're like oh yeah I didn't realize
[7:35] that until you remind me again.
[7:39] So anyway, it's not just calligraphy,
[7:40] it's just everything, you know, uh in
[7:43] our lives, right? So I hope that helped.
[7:47] >> It does help. It does help. One note to
[7:50] listeners and viewers, you will hear uh
[7:53] and Kyra Juul uh uh uttered the the word
[7:56] earlier and you will hear sometimes
[7:58] brother Fapyong and Kyra Lingo referring
[8:00] to their teacher Tiknanhan as Tay. Tay,
[8:04] I believe, is Vietnamese for teacher.
[8:06] Um, so don't be confused if you hear
[8:08] that word. Well, uh, the two of you have
[8:10] very kindly put together a top 10 list
[8:12] of your favorite of technan or tay's uh,
[8:15] phrases. Kyra Juul, I'm going to start
[8:17] uh, with you, but um, of course, Brother
[8:19] Faby Young, uh, please jump in. Um, and
[8:23] vice versa. Um, but here's phrase number
[8:26] one. Um, breathe,
[8:30] you are alive. Why does that resonate
[8:32] with you? such a central teaching of our
[8:35] teachers and of course of the Buddha. So
[8:40] breathe is first of all just remember
[8:42] that you are breathing and feel your
[8:46] breath. Be aware of your breathing and
[8:50] then breathe. You are alive
[8:53] is a reminder
[8:55] to feel this you know flow of life
[9:00] happening in us which if we if we
[9:03] actually feel our breathing we can begin
[9:06] to feel this sense of aliveness in our
[9:09] bodies. It's a very powerful feeling um
[9:14] that um we can forget and lose sight of
[9:18] and and we think we're just everything
[9:20] that our mind is telling us. And we can
[9:24] forget that we are alive, that we still
[9:27] have life. And so
[9:31] um when we forget that we are alive, we
[9:34] don't use our life very wisely. And so
[9:36] breathe you are alive is a invitation to
[9:40] come back to life
[9:42] to be fully alive to realize that we
[9:46] still have this moment and we can do
[9:49] something with it. We can be in in this
[9:51] moment in a way that um is beneficial
[9:55] for us and for others rather than be
[9:59] asleep be um dead to life. Right? life
[10:04] is offering us so many gifts all the
[10:07] time. Um the fact that we you know can
[10:11] perceive things can that we whatever
[10:13] senses we have you know those are gifts
[10:17] to be able to um you know feel the sun
[10:20] or or hear the rain or you know pet an
[10:24] animal or whatever it is. Um and and if
[10:29] we're if we're not alive, if we're not
[10:32] aware that we're alive, then all of
[10:34] those gifts um you know, don't get
[10:38] opened, we don't get to um enjoy them,
[10:41] appreciate them. And I don't know about
[10:43] you all, but as I am now in my 50s,
[10:47] I really feel like I'm on the downward
[10:49] slope
[10:51] and time seems to be going much faster.
[10:54] And I think a lot about how I don't have
[10:56] much time like like the way I saw time
[10:59] as a young person. It's really changing
[11:01] and I'm really seeing my life and like
[11:04] how do I want to use this time like it's
[11:06] it's really limited like the expiration
[11:09] date is coming closer and closer every
[11:11] day. I mean and we never know, right? It
[11:14] could be today. We just there's no
[11:16] guarantees. This life is is so precious
[11:19] and you know people can just exit so
[11:23] quickly in such kind of surprising ways.
[11:26] You know a friend of ours fell down the
[11:29] stairs and
[11:31] had a very serious head injury and she
[11:34] may never recover from it just from
[11:36] falling down the stairs. And that can
[11:39] happen to any of us. I'm not not trying
[11:40] to, you know, scare anybody but just
[11:43] this is reality. our days here are very,
[11:47] you know, numbered and our lives are
[11:50] super fragile. However much we try to
[11:54] convince ourselves that we're
[11:55] invincible.
[11:57] And so, yeah, this calligraphy is like,
[12:00] you know, live life to the fullest while
[12:01] you can. Celebrate the people in your
[12:03] life now. Love them as much as you can.
[12:07] Love yourself. Get to know yourself.
[12:09] Cultivate your mind and heart. And and
[12:12] don't wait. that point you made about um
[12:15] time accelerating. I am in my mid-50s
[12:17] and I feel that I don't know who said
[12:19] it. There was a a female writer who said
[12:22] something I believe in her 80s that uh
[12:25] to the effect of when you reach my age
[12:28] it feels like breakfast arrives every 15
[12:31] minutes.
[12:38] >> It does.
[12:39] >> It's really true.
[12:41] I hear it all the time, Dan. I know I
[12:44] should meditate, but I'm too busy. And I
[12:47] get it. Many of us feel time starved,
[12:49] which is why over on my meditation app,
[12:51] 10% with Dan Harris, we now have a whole
[12:54] batch of super short meditations. I'm
[12:56] talking 3 to 5 minutes. These new
[12:58] meditations are from this amazing
[13:01] teacher, Devon Haza, who you may have
[13:03] heard of. She wrote a great book called
[13:04] How to Not Be a Hot Mess. These
[13:07] meditations are on self-compassion, on
[13:09] learning to pause, on getting back in
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[13:24] harris.com. We'll be right back after
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[14:58] You know, I I get this exhortation and I
[15:01] resonate deeply with this exhortation to
[15:03] be alive while you're alive. You know,
[15:05] in other words, stop sleepwalking. I I
[15:08] don't want to overlook the fact though
[15:10] that um waking up is not all rainbow
[15:15] barfing unicorns. Like we being awake
[15:18] also means you're going to experience
[15:21] the sadness of a friend falling down and
[15:24] um perhaps damaging his or her brain.
[15:28] You're going to experience the pain of
[15:30] illness. You're going to experience
[15:32] um all sorts of physical discomfort and
[15:34] on and on.
[15:36] >> Yeah, that is a uh you know as a young
[15:38] person first coming across Thai and the
[15:41] a retreat and then hearing this it's
[15:44] like you know what's the big deal? But
[15:46] it it actually woke me up to to realize
[15:49] some of the things that we chase for and
[15:51] consider our happiness. I grew up in Los
[15:54] Angeles and a culture that is like
[15:56] always trying to achieve you know as an
[15:59] architect there's very uh uh there's a
[16:01] lot of things goals that I want and so I
[16:04] think this when I first came across
[16:06] across this I first did not like it but
[16:10] then I realized the powerful truth of it
[16:13] that actually you know being alive and
[16:16] that just that simple uh awareness like
[16:20] it it woke me up and It's because there
[16:23] was also a shadow side to this phrase
[16:26] breathe you alive meaning you know you
[16:29] are going to die and there's so that
[16:33] combination of awareness that life is so
[16:36] precious and why are you running after
[16:38] these things that so it is a training to
[16:42] actually come back to these things that
[16:44] are right in front of your face that you
[16:46] have good lungs your eyes are in good
[16:49] condition as a young person coming
[16:51] across this and cultivating this
[16:54] awareness of these simple and I remember
[16:57] visualizing sometime and seeing myself
[17:00] in the hospital bed with tubes in my
[17:02] nose cuz I've seen this with my dad with
[17:05] sick people that we visit in the
[17:07] hospital. So I know that breathing for
[17:10] them is so precious. So it is an
[17:13] exercise. It is a training to actually
[17:16] feel this truth rather than just say oh
[17:19] I agree I don't agree. The breathe you
[17:22] alive is a a reminder for us to
[17:25] cultivate that. It's like that simple
[17:27] awareness like right now you are alive
[17:31] eventually you will be in the hospital
[17:34] just like your loved ones are your
[17:36] friends and so on. And breathing will be
[17:39] like it it would be so precious that you
[17:42] can take a breath on your own and so on.
[17:45] And this for me like it's so tight our
[17:49] teacher you know and they measured his
[17:51] breath while he was sick in the hospital
[17:54] and with this finger thing and it was
[17:56] like the the oxygen uh so he's been
[17:59] training his whole life breathing
[18:01] deeply. It was almost 99%. and they
[18:05] measured ours all the attendance and
[18:07] we're like in our like low 90s and 80s
[18:10] and here's a you know our teacher is
[18:12] sick in the bed and it's like almost
[18:15] 100%. So it's a very interesting uh and
[18:18] I I keep that in mind now to actually
[18:21] breathe deeply and I think you know I
[18:24] think physiology has shown that we you
[18:27] you know the breathing helps the
[18:29] aliveness in your you know your brain
[18:32] your life and so on your positivity as
[18:35] well. So, it's not like a just a a
[18:38] philosophical or religious thing, but
[18:40] it's it's it's that, you know, breath,
[18:42] spirit, they're all related. Breathe,
[18:45] you're alive. It's uh pretty basic, but
[18:48] also massively important and uh worth
[18:52] being reminded of uh quite frequently.
[18:54] Okay, so that's uh that's phrase number
[18:57] one in this top 10 list. Uh let's move
[18:59] to phrase number two. Brother Fapyang,
[19:00] I'm going to stay with you for this one.
[19:02] Uh and here's the phrase, the present
[19:04] moment is the only moment available to
[19:08] us. Please say more.
[19:09] >> You know, our whole practice is to to
[19:11] stay in the present moment because I
[19:13] think our coaching, my education
[19:16] is so uh has trained us to always try to
[19:19] like run after the future. So this is a
[19:23] a kind of sickness of our our culture
[19:26] and our education running um and
[19:30] thinking that our happiness is in the
[19:32] future. So the present moment is really
[19:34] precious and here the present moment
[19:37] includes also uh the past and the
[19:41] future. How you take care of healing of
[19:44] your past as well as your purpose is how
[19:47] you take care of your present moment.
[19:49] And this is so beautiful and I've seen
[19:52] and I've experienced this myself
[19:54] practicing cuz we're so worried about
[19:56] what the future is and then some of us
[19:59] still carry the past and it's heavy but
[20:02] I feel like if we take care of the
[20:04] present moment like uh like whatever you
[20:06] need to do and you you're fully present
[20:10] insight comes about my past and so I've
[20:14] had realizations and changed my past or
[20:18] changed the way I look at my past by
[20:21] being fully in the present moment. It
[20:23] includes the three times the future, the
[20:26] past and the present. So for me that is
[20:29] a a kind of way of dealing and and fully
[20:35] kind of in the present moment you can uh
[20:38] actually find new futures because for
[20:42] instance like what I used to think it
[20:44] was the direction of my life running to
[20:46] be a famous architect
[20:49] by taking care of the and you know and I
[20:50] sacrificed a lot of myself and my heart
[20:54] my my my my caring my my you know
[20:58] communal energy that these things I
[21:00] sacrificed because it was competitive
[21:03] and I wanted something in the future and
[21:06] the practice helped me to come back to
[21:08] the present moment and take care of
[21:10] myself and these kind of simple act
[21:13] redirected my aim towards my future I
[21:16] don't know so in a way when you take
[21:18] care of the present moment it changes
[21:20] the future your aspiration what you want
[21:24] and it clarifies and it tones phones in
[21:26] and it makes the happiness not in
[21:29] achieving it but as a direction in the
[21:33] present moment. Uh so this is my
[21:35] experience how this teaching of taking
[21:38] care of the po present moment has helped
[21:41] me heal my past. So I don't change the
[21:44] past but I change the way I look at my
[21:46] what happened to me during the war with
[21:48] my family, what happened to me in my
[21:51] relationship to my dad. So the way I
[21:54] look at it changes. So in a way changing
[21:57] the past because it's uh it's now
[22:00] healing and it's more accepting of my
[22:02] father, accepting of the trauma of being
[22:05] refugee and being discriminated and so
[22:08] now I don't blame it's just you know it
[22:10] it it's just I used to be very uh angry
[22:13] at those things that happened and now I
[22:16] I see that oh those conditions actually
[22:18] make who I am now in the present moment
[22:21] and I cherish that. So for me that's uh
[22:23] that that's what the phrase uh uh uh
[22:25] teaches me and what has helped me uh uh
[22:28] kind of redirect a little bit and say
[22:31] you know I'm not running anymore and I
[22:34] also know that there's stuff in the past
[22:36] with me for me to heal. So this is uh in
[22:39] the present moment. So it's kind of like
[22:41] an anchor and you know when you you've
[22:44] lost it is when you're like carried away
[22:46] and you're you know trying to achieve
[22:48] and you sacrifice the present.
[22:51] So that's what uh you know that phrase
[22:53] present moment is the only moment
[22:57] is written that theme many many
[23:00] different ways present moment wonderful
[23:02] moment present moment this is the only
[23:05] moment so t is you know many versions of
[23:09] that
[23:09] >> it's funny for me when we uh we talk
[23:12] about the present moment because it is
[23:13] like the the spiritual cliche therefore
[23:18] when you hear you know exhortations to
[23:21] be in the moment, it's easy to kind of
[23:23] ignore them. Um, and I've been thinking
[23:26] about this a lot recently because I've
[23:27] been experiencing um a very
[23:30] uncomfortable uptick in anxiety
[23:32] personally. And what is anxiety if not,
[23:35] you know, uh uh uh pulling you into
[23:38] fretful projections about the future?
[23:41] And
[23:44] I find that just remembering to wake up,
[23:47] be with my life as it is right now, uh
[23:51] coexist with the discomfort of anxiety,
[23:54] the physical sensations that that have
[23:56] come along with it, but but can be
[23:58] experienced in the present moment. I
[24:01] find that this this idea that's often
[24:05] rendered as a cliche can be very
[24:07] powerful as
[24:10] um a way to make life better even in
[24:13] difficult times. So I say all that um
[24:17] Kyra Juel just to get your thoughts on
[24:19] anything brother Faby Young said or
[24:21] anything I just said or just on the
[24:23] phrase generally. You know, I think when
[24:25] when things are difficult,
[24:28] um it can be hard to remember
[24:32] that there are useful things in this
[24:36] moment when it's when it's hard, when we
[24:39] feel anxiety, when we feel um stress.
[24:44] And it's uh it's wonderful to hear, you
[24:46] know, your practice of of yeah, sort of
[24:50] turning toward that. Um,
[24:54] and I I would really say that, you know,
[24:57] we can only do that in the present
[24:59] moment. Like we can't take care of
[25:01] ourselves outside of the present moment.
[25:04] Um,
[25:05] when whether it's, you know, beauty and
[25:08] joy that's arising, whether it's pain or
[25:12] um, you know, suffering that's arising,
[25:15] um, the present moment is the only
[25:18] moment where we can handle that, right?
[25:20] We can try to get out of it. Out of that
[25:24] escaping to the past, escaping to the
[25:26] future,
[25:28] drowning ourselves in the present with,
[25:30] you know, with some kind of, you know,
[25:33] distraction.
[25:35] But um but the only place we can meet
[25:39] ourselves and really take care of
[25:41] ourselves and really be free from these
[25:43] things that um haunt us or are so hard
[25:47] to to experience. That is another way to
[25:50] say the present moment is the only
[25:52] moment. That it's only by you know
[25:54] stopping and turning towards what's so
[25:58] challenging that we can become free of
[26:01] it if we try to get away from it. We
[26:04] might do that temporarily but it will
[26:06] often just make that experience
[26:09] um you know more intense harder in the
[26:12] end. So it's like you know the present
[26:15] moment is the only moment is like how
[26:17] can we make peace with whatever is
[26:19] happening because if we can do that a
[26:24] whole range of experience will open up
[26:27] for us where we where we only see two
[26:29] dimensions. If we can really turn
[26:31] towards this moment in all of its
[26:35] horror, in all of its, you know,
[26:39] surprise, whatever,
[26:42] the three, four, five dimensionality
[26:44] will will manifest to us and we can see
[26:48] it. Um,
[26:50] we can experience it in a different way.
[26:52] Um, I just had an experience this past
[26:55] weekend where I just was, you know, I'm
[26:58] I'm a pretty uh,
[27:01] I don't know, upbeat person. I don't
[27:03] have a lot of down moods, but I did I I
[27:07] just couldn't shake it. This one morning
[27:10] I, you know, some different things had
[27:11] happened and I was just kind of feeling
[27:14] low and I turned to my partner and I'm
[27:16] like, I'm just in this place. He just
[27:18] good. Let's talk about it. Just be in
[27:20] it. don't you know like there's nothing
[27:23] wrong with this you know it was such a
[27:25] helpful reflection cuz in my mind I'm
[27:28] like what's wrong I'm not usually I
[27:30] don't usually feel this way where I feel
[27:32] kind of like I just can't um you know
[27:36] move through something difficult and we
[27:38] just talked about it and we talked about
[27:40] whatever the things it might be that was
[27:42] coming up and you know the conditions
[27:46] were right we had the space we had the
[27:48] time we you
[27:50] And just just doing that it it passed,
[27:54] you know, it like I gave it space. I
[27:56] gave it time. I I honored that and I
[27:59] explored it. I was curious about it and
[28:02] and something shifted in doing that. So
[28:05] there's so many unexpected and hidden
[28:07] gifts in these difficult times that if
[28:10] if we can hang out in the present
[28:13] moment. Um
[28:16] you know it it gives them a chance to
[28:18] show us their other sides.
[28:20] >> It's so interesting because I'm I don't
[28:24] have as much meditation experience as
[28:26] either of you, but I've got, you know,
[28:28] some. And and yet when I'm in a moment
[28:31] of depression or anxiety, the last thing
[28:35] I want to do is feel it. Like I want to
[28:38] check my phone, eat something,
[28:41] uh distract myself in some way, go chase
[28:44] one of our cats, whatever. Anything that
[28:47] to not feel the thing. And yet feeling
[28:51] the thing is the way out. It's the way
[28:54] to suffer less. just express our whole
[28:58] culture.
[29:01] We just distract ourselves with
[29:03] consumption so we don't have to deal
[29:05] with the present moment. Yeah. It's uh
[29:07] it's actually the great medicine for our
[29:10] times considering the digitizing of all
[29:13] our lives
[29:15] where we're easily doing something else
[29:17] rather than being in the present moment.
[29:20] I mean I see it so often at the airport.
[29:22] I love to play this game to go there to
[29:24] see it's someone is really at the
[29:26] airport and present.
[29:29] It's very hard. It's like rare species
[29:31] to have someone sit there and just like
[29:34] not doing something to catch up or like
[29:37] whatever work or so I go to the airport
[29:39] and I sit there and I play this game.
[29:42] That's how I stay in the present moment
[29:44] because it's so easy to catch up on my
[29:47] email, get out of my laptop or read a
[29:49] book or but it's just like you know I I
[29:53] so anyway it's my medicine to actually
[29:55] go to the airport and I have like a
[29:57] 2hour window and I'm sitting there and I
[30:01] have this itch to catch up to do email
[30:04] to like catch up on the news or do
[30:06] something and I was like okay because I
[30:09] remember when I did that I was reading a
[30:11] book and Tai came over and he like with
[30:14] his two finger closed the book and say
[30:17] go and join your brothers and sister and
[30:20] they're all on the ground sitting having
[30:22] tea and I was like no but this like in
[30:25] my mind I was like this book is so good
[30:27] t and I closed it with his two finger
[30:30] but the way he did it it never left me
[30:33] so now when I'm at the airport I'm so
[30:36] like aware that my teacher is going to
[30:38] close the book on me
[30:41] because You know, we're so easily
[30:43] tempted to be doing something else and
[30:46] it might be even the best thing which is
[30:48] like, "Oh, I'm going to catch up on
[30:49] this. I got to write this email from
[30:51] someone." Anyway, that is the culture at
[30:53] the airport. I don't know if you know
[30:54] this, but like it's
[30:56] >> I have I have I've I was I've been at
[30:59] the airport a lot recently because I've
[31:00] been flying a lot and uh the next time
[31:04] I'm at the airport, I'm going to take
[31:05] this on as a practice of
[31:08] I don't I hope it doesn't make me
[31:10] somewhere though.
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[31:26] even worse. I think a lot of people put
[31:28] them off way longer than they should
[31:30] because it just feels like a whole
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[32:39] I just want to add one other piece to
[32:41] this because I I remember I asked Tai
[32:44] this question when I first the first
[32:46] summer I spent at Plum Village. I was
[32:48] like, "But how do you plan for the
[32:50] future? I understand being in the
[32:51] present moment, but how we all have to
[32:54] plan for the future." And so I remember
[32:56] I wrote a note to him. And I get this
[32:59] question so often from people that I
[33:01] just wanted to share, you know, his
[33:03] response which which has really held
[33:05] true for me. all this time was he was
[33:07] like it's very possible to plan for the
[33:10] future while being in the present. You
[33:13] don't have to sacrifice the the the
[33:15] present in order to plan for the future.
[33:17] You can know I'm planning for the future
[33:20] right now. And you can still feel your
[33:22] body. You can still feel your breathing.
[33:24] You can still, you know, you know, if
[33:27] you start to plan and you start to feel
[33:29] anxious, that's what happens to me. I
[33:31] look at my calendar. I'm like, "Oh my
[33:32] gosh, but this is happening, but I have
[33:34] to do that. Oh, I I didn't realize I
[33:36] double booked or whatever and then you
[33:38] get anxious. Being part of right being
[33:41] in the present moment as the only moment
[33:43] is knowing that's happening coming back
[33:47] feeling the body. Okay, I can handle
[33:50] this. This is going to be okay. I might
[33:52] need to write an apology to someone or
[33:53] whatever. But so you can be uh taking
[33:58] care of the future even as you are
[34:01] grounded in the present and you notice
[34:03] what's happening to your mind as you
[34:05] start to plan and you you support
[34:08] yourself to do it.
[34:10] >> Yeah, I love that. I love that. Car
[34:13] Joel, let me stay with you because I
[34:14] want to move on to the third phrase. And
[34:16] I'm just going to say right now, we're
[34:18] not getting through top 10 phrase. We're
[34:20] just not this. We're just two. We're
[34:22] three chatter boxes and it's just not
[34:23] going to happen. So, we'll get through
[34:25] as many as we get through.
[34:28] >> Yes.
[34:29] >> The conceit of the top 10 list has now
[34:32] officially been abandoned. Um and uh
[34:35] let's just enjoy the freedom of that. Um
[34:38] okay. So, the third phrase is um uh I
[34:42] have arrived. I am home. So, Kyra Joel,
[34:47] what does this mean to you? You know,
[34:48] Tai has said if if if he were to
[34:52] condense all of his teachings or
[34:54] summarize all of his teachings of, you
[34:57] know, 80 years because he became a monk
[34:59] at 16 or, you know, almost that that
[35:02] many decades.
[35:05] It would be this one sentence. I have
[35:07] arrived. I am home. And for me, it
[35:09] really means there's nowhere else that
[35:12] we need to be. This is it. like we are
[35:16] um wherever we are in in the here in the
[35:19] now we can call it our home. We can come
[35:24] home to ourselves. we can arrive fully
[35:28] in this moment. And you know, sometimes
[35:31] I think about it as like calling back
[35:33] all the various parts of myselves cuz
[35:35] sometimes we can, you know, one part of
[35:37] ourselves is over there thinking about
[35:39] that or holding that concern, one part
[35:41] of ourselves is over there in the past
[35:43] or future or worrying about that
[35:46] situation or thinking about that person.
[35:48] But so I have arrived is like calling
[35:50] all of them back to just be right here,
[35:54] you know, and
[35:56] and then when when we have fully arrived
[36:01] like then we can actually
[36:04] engage with something or someone, right?
[36:06] Like I'll I mentor people and sometimes
[36:10] we get on Zoom and they're like, "Oh, I
[36:12] just came from a meeting or I just did."
[36:14] I'm like, okay, let's take a few minutes
[36:16] in silence before we start our session.
[36:19] And invariably when we do that, after
[36:21] even just 2 minutes, 3 minutes, they're
[36:23] like, oh, I needed that. Right? So, it's
[36:26] this acknowledgment that we sometimes
[36:28] can be very dispersed. And so, I have
[36:31] arrived is calling ourselves back to
[36:34] this moment. And Tai would often say um
[36:37] the address of our um true home is the
[36:41] here and the now. That is the address.
[36:44] That's where we know we can find
[36:46] ourselves. If we put the GPS to help us
[36:49] figure it out, it's here and now. Like
[36:53] no other place, no other time. So I come
[36:57] back and I touch that I actually have
[37:00] everything I need right in this moment.
[37:03] I can be at peace with things just as
[37:05] they are. Realizing I can take a breath.
[37:09] I can take a step. I can um feel my
[37:13] body. I can notice what's happening in
[37:16] my mind and I can be 100% here. You
[37:21] know, Tay would often tell us he often
[37:24] taught this teaching when we were about
[37:26] to do walking meditation cuz so often
[37:28] when we walk, we walk in order to get
[37:31] somewhere. We don't walk
[37:34] um just to be in each step.
[37:38] And so he would invite us to practice
[37:40] this as we would walk that we would
[37:42] breathe in and take one step and say I
[37:45] have arrived,
[37:46] breathe out, take a step and say I am
[37:49] home and really come home. I remember he
[37:52] put stickers in our shoes. He gave us
[37:55] stickers once to put in our shoes that
[37:57] said 100%.
[37:59] So that when we put our shoes on after
[38:01] we come out of the meditation hall, we
[38:04] we say I'm going to walk with 100% of my
[38:08] being, of my attention.
[38:10] And that's part of I am home, right? I
[38:15] have arrived in every step. It's I'm
[38:17] 100% here. I'm not dispersed. I'm not,
[38:22] you know, and it's okay, too, if we're
[38:25] 20% here. we realize, okay, I'm only 20%
[38:28] here. And so we walk a few more steps,
[38:30] maybe we're 30% here. And then we slowly
[38:33] slowly over time, we become more and
[38:36] more and more percent of ourselves is
[38:39] really at home. And when we get that
[38:41] feeling of being arrived, being at home,
[38:45] there's nothing like it,
[38:47] you know, nothing compares to that
[38:49] feeling. Um, no ice cream or whatever
[38:54] else we think is so pleasurable or so,
[38:58] you know, we got to have it. Nothing is
[39:00] as good as feeling like we are home
[39:03] right here, right now, that we don't
[39:06] need anything else. We don't need to
[39:08] become anything else. We don't need to
[39:10] have anything more in our bank account.
[39:12] We don't need to, you know, have um this
[39:16] or that status symbol. We we really are
[39:19] um perfectly content to be just as we
[39:23] are.
[39:24] >> As I'm listening to you speak, I'm I'm
[39:26] I'm having a memory of many years ago. I
[39:29] went on a meditation retreat and I did a
[39:32] very dumb thing, which is um I let a
[39:34] camera crew come with me. Um cuz we were
[39:38] filming it for content uh for uh my
[39:41] meditation app, which is like typical
[39:44] move of like double dipping always, you
[39:47] know, being maximally productive. Not
[39:49] I'm going to do a retreat, but it's
[39:50] going to it's going to be content. And
[39:53] uh the first couple of days, the
[39:54] cameraman was really bothering me. And
[39:56] plus, the first few days of a retreat
[39:57] are horrible anyway. Um, but by day
[40:01] seven or eight of this nine-day thing, I
[40:04] really did arrive. And there's I saw a
[40:08] video the other day cuz we're finally
[40:10] starting to use the video from it where
[40:12] I'm just standing outside kind of gazing
[40:15] up, eyes closed, but like my head kind
[40:18] of slightly tilted upward with this rays
[40:21] of sun hitting my face and I look so
[40:23] stupid. But I am really happy. Like I am
[40:27] truly at home in the universe, as
[40:30] cliched as that sounds. And you're
[40:33] right. Like I my lizard brain is telling
[40:35] me that true pleasure will come from
[40:39] finishing that next thing on my to-do
[40:41] list, going to a meal, watching a movie,
[40:44] whatever it is, like the next party I've
[40:46] got going uh going on or that's on my
[40:49] calendar. But actually, the deepest
[40:52] happiness I've ever experienced is when
[40:54] all of that falls away and I'm just
[40:57] right here. It's so embarrassing that
[40:59] the truest things in the world are also
[41:02] annoying cliches
[41:06] and so hard. I just want to acknowledge
[41:08] it. It's so I can say this and I know it
[41:11] and yet so often I will choose the movie
[41:16] or you know getting one more thing done
[41:19] when I could do do the you know I mean
[41:23] thing is is that it it it can it can
[41:26] take a while to get there and that's
[41:29] where it's hard to sometimes put in the
[41:32] the time.
[41:34] >> That's kind of like why these
[41:35] calligraphies are are
[41:37] Yeah, they're like so essence, so
[41:40] simple,
[41:42] but like so hard as well. And that's
[41:44] basically what makes a good calligraphy
[41:46] or what makes a good like condensed
[41:50] teaching of that teacher cuz it's like
[41:54] it's so easy and you're like, "Oh, come.
[41:56] Oh, yeah. I get it."
[41:58] But it's so powerful. And so this this
[42:01] this uh phrase I'm a home, it's my
[42:04] anchor.
[42:05] So it's always been my anchor and it
[42:08] ever since I became you know into this
[42:10] practice and tradition it's like anytime
[42:12] I feel flustered it is what I come back
[42:15] to and it's saved me so many times and I
[42:19] swear it works all the time and you just
[42:21] stick with it for like whatever however
[42:23] many minutes and you just feel like ah
[42:25] you have such a much more space but that
[42:29] I wanted to share with you like I've on
[42:32] this phrase I've always contemplated
[42:34] Right. And I I want to go into the brain
[42:36] of Thai when he actually formulated this
[42:39] when he was a refugee or exiled from his
[42:42] country and all his students were being
[42:45] killed and you know persecuted in
[42:48] Vietnam and you know the Vietnamese
[42:50] people our people were being like bombed
[42:52] on and he's here exiled from
[42:56] doing something about it and you can
[42:58] feel that pain and wanting to go back
[43:01] and then later on for finally finally
[43:03] realizing and accepting that. And now I
[43:06] just think of the historical moment or
[43:09] that surrounded Tai that actually
[43:12] squeezed this phrase out that is so like
[43:16] right on,
[43:19] you know, but I does have I have a
[43:21] historical uh uh sense to it that he,
[43:24] you know, he longed to go back. He
[43:25] didn't choose to be out here in the
[43:27] west. it was like you know like forced
[43:31] on him and like you know a lot of
[43:33] Vietnamese people. So I think that was a
[43:36] teaching in the historical context to a
[43:39] culture of a Vietnamese people who had
[43:41] to you know take refuge outside of the
[43:43] country because of of war and
[43:46] destruction. So I think for me to to for
[43:50] me as a refugee and Vietnamese you know
[43:53] being outside of my own culture to come
[43:56] home and what is my real culture? what
[43:58] is my real authenticity
[44:00] and it's so beautiful and it's helped me
[44:03] come to terms with my kind of by culture
[44:06] and like belonging.
[44:08] So anyway, it addresses a lot of what's
[44:10] happening with people and identity and
[44:13] where we belong. So arriving at home is
[44:16] such a good medicine and I and I feel
[44:19] that in Thai like you know it came
[44:22] because of this wanting to help his
[44:24] country and his fellow people and then
[44:26] he finally accepted it. I was like,
[44:28] "Okay, no need to go back to Vietnam,
[44:31] you know." So, you transcend
[44:33] the notion of where is your real home?
[44:36] You you you know where is your real
[44:38] home, you know? It's where love and and
[44:41] and accepting of yourself. I have to put
[44:43] it in that perspective because it's
[44:45] happening, you know, right now in the
[44:47] world like a lot of refugees and a lot
[44:49] of uh with the Palestinians and so on
[44:52] and and with the Jewish people, right?
[44:54] So, it is a a great beautiful comment.
[44:57] if we don't you know uh uh yeah so yeah
[45:02] for me just to add that point in there
[45:05] of the history of our teacher and his
[45:07] experience and with many people who are
[45:11] running and refugees and so on. So it's
[45:15] uh to find that healing and that will
[45:18] connect you with beyond just your
[45:21] culture and your you know cultural
[45:24] identity and your your nation and
[45:26] whatever. I think it it is a beautiful
[45:28] key I think for the unifying our human
[45:32] family rather than identifying
[45:35] you know home as a culture or a nation
[45:38] or an ideology and that phrase has that
[45:41] for me not just from Buddhism but a a
[45:44] time of war in Vietnam.
[45:47] >> Yeah I appreciate the context it's
[45:49] really helpful. Can I say one more thing
[45:51] because it was so beautiful what you
[45:53] just said brother about um where our
[45:55] true home really is. I just want to add
[45:59] when you do this practice deeply
[46:02] you become a home for other people too
[46:05] cuz Tai really was a home for so many
[46:08] people. He he showed so many people how
[46:12] to find their true home and he was also
[46:15] part of that home and he he because he
[46:19] was able to take such refuge in himself.
[46:22] He showed so many people like you said
[46:26] brother who who may have been refugees
[46:28] or you know so many people of color in
[46:31] this country who don't feel at home.
[46:33] There is this deep deep teaching that we
[46:36] all of us can find home and and we can
[46:40] take refuge in ourselves and it's not
[46:42] about I mean yes the world outside needs
[46:45] to be injustices need to be addressed
[46:48] but the more we can find that deep peace
[46:52] in ourselves
[46:53] the better we can address those
[46:55] injustices.
[46:57] Okay, phrase number four.
[47:00] Brother Fapy Young, let me let me come
[47:02] to you for this. This phrase is very
[47:05] short, three words.
[47:07] This is it. What does that mean? This is
[47:09] it.
[47:10] >> You know, we were prevented from using
[47:12] that for the tour because Michael
[47:15] Jackson
[47:17] it
[47:20] is just like it it reminds me of this
[47:22] corporate culture.
[47:25] But also, you know, humorously, of
[47:27] course, you know, but yeah, this is it
[47:30] is it's so powerful, you know, three
[47:32] words and, you know, you know, people
[47:35] use it in the song and all that, but for
[47:37] me, when you know, I hear Tai share it,
[47:40] it's it's kind of like a whack, you
[47:42] know, and in the face a little bit
[47:44] because, you know, we sometimes we don't
[47:46] want to accept the present moment or
[47:49] like our situation and what's happening
[47:51] to this country, you know, and actually
[47:55] This is it teaches us to to really uh
[47:59] come back to what is happening within us
[48:04] and accept it first. This is it. So for
[48:08] me that that's how I when I uh uh hear
[48:12] Thai and when I come to this phrase um
[48:16] and it's helped me to to really not um
[48:19] because so many of us we want to like
[48:21] get rid of something that we don't want.
[48:23] So for me that's a it's something to do
[48:25] with not denying what is happening like
[48:28] you know I still get angry and I I beat
[48:31] myself up for it you know and it's you
[48:34] know for us for me to really accept
[48:36] myself well this is this is it this is
[48:40] who I am right now and this is and so in
[48:44] accepting that it gives me uh more um
[48:47] like more warmth to you know really look
[48:51] into it and then and actually go
[48:54] apologize, you know. So for me, yeah, I
[48:57] used to actually uh my my MO before
[49:02] coming into this practice is actually
[49:04] not accepting things. And so for me,
[49:07] this is it
[49:09] is a reminder that uh you know to accept
[49:13] the suffering and to accept the uh the
[49:16] the the the happiness.
[49:19] Acceptance is another one of these
[49:22] spiritual terms that gets thrown around
[49:25] a lot. Um I think where people get
[49:29] confused and maybe even frustrated is
[49:32] how do you draw the line between
[49:33] accepting things as they are not being
[49:35] at war with reality and um being passive
[49:39] or a doormat or a paluca on the other
[49:41] hand.
[49:42] >> Yeah. Know it's just the first step.
[49:44] It's not like you don't and then the
[49:46] second step is to look into it.
[49:49] And for me not accepting it, I go around
[49:52] denying it or don't want to ignore it or
[49:54] delay it or don't want you know it's
[49:56] like I have that uh habit. So for me
[50:01] it's not accepting that is like uh not
[50:03] changing and not acting and do anything.
[50:06] But if I don't accept it, I I still am
[50:09] caught in it and uh uh like especially
[50:12] denial, but it could be emotional like
[50:14] I'm really,
[50:16] you know, I'm like the the energy is hot
[50:18] and if I don't really, you know, so it
[50:21] help me to remind me to like calm down
[50:26] and then and come to terms with they
[50:28] look into it and so there, you know,
[50:31] it's not uh uh uh pass it. So this is it
[50:37] and so you know you can repeat it and
[50:40] then it helps you stop and then I look
[50:44] into it. So they it's helped me a lot
[50:46] with um dealing with my own kind of like
[50:50] not accepting myself cuz I still have a
[50:53] lot of weaknesses still a lot of things
[50:54] to transform.
[50:56] And so for me this phrase reminds me of
[50:58] that every time I see it or I hear Tai
[51:01] talk about it. And so it reminds me that
[51:04] you know uh there are other aspects to
[51:06] me and then there are other aspects to
[51:08] life as well not just the difficulties
[51:11] and there's also the wonder and those
[51:14] things can coexist. So this thing wakes
[51:17] me up to that. It it helps me um yeah to
[51:20] to deal with it more. I give it a little
[51:23] distance
[51:24] and then I come back to it.
[51:27] We all know we should be exercising,
[51:29] moving our body. And yet, when life gets
[51:32] busy or stressful or hectic, exercise is
[51:35] often the first thing to go, which can
[51:37] kind of put you down a a toilet because
[51:40] you are busy and stressed, so you don't
[51:42] exercise. But then the lack of exercise
[51:44] makes you even more stressed and feel
[51:46] even worse and then you're heading in
[51:49] the wrong direction. Which brings me to
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[52:46] code happier for $200 off. Kyra Juel, I
[52:49] imagine this is a question you get from
[52:51] your students all the time as well, like
[52:53] what does acceptance really mean? I
[52:55] think what brother Faby Youngung is
[52:56] saying is, and I'd be curious for your
[52:58] take on this is, yeah, acceptance is the
[53:01] first step. Um, but you can't take
[53:04] effective action from a position or a
[53:07] standpoint of denial. So, uh, you got to
[53:10] start where you are.
[53:11] >> Absolutely. And you know to me it's it's
[53:14] all about
[53:17] how do we come to the situation if we
[53:20] come to it with a big block or a pushing
[53:24] it away or a judging it or a tensing
[53:26] against it. You know just like when you
[53:28] have pain in your body. If you tense
[53:31] against that pain it's going to make it
[53:33] worse. But if you can open to that pain,
[53:37] if you can breathe into that pain, if
[53:40] you can,
[53:42] you know, um, you know, you have to have
[53:46] a resourced mind to get curious about
[53:49] it. But if you can, um, soften around
[53:52] it, if you can even let it expand and
[53:55] take up more space, all of those things
[53:58] will have a very different effect on the
[54:00] pain than doubling down. and
[54:04] clenching uh you know guarding against
[54:08] it. And so, um, you know, I have back
[54:12] issues and I've been learning well also
[54:15] with an app called Hinge Health that
[54:18] it's like a physical therapy app that
[54:20] gives you exercises, but it has these
[54:21] really helpful articles that help you
[54:24] understand pain as well and and and just
[54:27] how to how to heal yourself when you've
[54:29] had an injury. and and they you know
[54:33] based on medical research it says you
[54:35] know you you have a perception of your
[54:37] pain that's not always accurate right
[54:41] that you you will guard against doing
[54:43] things but actually if you you know
[54:45] having a little bit of discomfort or
[54:47] some discomfort as you heal is normal so
[54:50] if you prevent yourself from doing those
[54:52] things you won't heal.
[54:54] So you know it's like how do we approach
[54:56] pain? How do we approach difficulty
[54:59] challenge if we can approach it with
[55:01] this willingness to have some bitterness
[55:04] in our lives? Like Tay would often teach
[55:07] about this um vegetable bitter melon
[55:10] that's um an Asian vegetable. It's it
[55:13] looks really cool. It has all these
[55:15] knobs on it. It's bright green but it's
[55:17] very bitter
[55:19] but it's good for your heart. It's
[55:22] really good for you. And so um if we're
[55:25] willing to um you know take in the
[55:29] bitterness
[55:31] there can be you know some real
[55:33] benefits. Um so it's our it's our
[55:36] attitude to that and and anytime we can
[55:40] um
[55:42] you know open rather than shut down
[55:46] uh that's that can really help the
[55:47] situation or soften rather than tense
[55:50] up. And just one other thing about um
[55:53] surrendering to things as they are is
[55:56] different from giving up. That um when
[55:59] we surrender
[56:02] to things as they are, we can work with
[56:06] them. We can we still have access to our
[56:09] full capacity. If if we talk about it in
[56:13] terms of brain science, you know, if
[56:16] surrendering means we still have our
[56:18] executive function available,
[56:20] giving up, we are we are in our lizard
[56:24] brain. We're we're we're in collapse
[56:26] mode. We're in, you know, um we don't we
[56:30] don't see our agency. So when we
[56:33] surrender, we are accepting the way
[56:35] things are, but we still see that we
[56:39] have choices. we have, you know, this
[56:42] amazing, you know, human mind that can,
[56:47] you know, work with the hardest of
[56:49] circumstances and still have some
[56:51] measure of freedom. If if we think of,
[56:54] you know, all of our heroes like the
[56:56] Tibetan monks and nuns who were in
[56:58] Chinese gulags or Nelson Mandela in in
[57:02] jail for so many years or Ellie Vessel
[57:06] in in the concentration camps, right?
[57:08] like how did they how did they keep
[57:11] their humanity? How did they come out of
[57:13] those experiences more whole? It was
[57:16] because they understood surrender the
[57:19] power of just accepting this is it. This
[57:22] is these are my circumstances. I still
[57:25] have a choice of where I put my mind of
[57:27] how I use my attention.
[57:30] I can't change the circumstances but I
[57:34] can um I can allow this really difficult
[57:38] situation to ripen me in some way to
[57:41] mature me in some way. Can I just share
[57:44] the the this phrase this practice uh has
[57:48] helped me a lot do to to it brought me a
[57:51] lot of pain in the last 6 months a year
[57:54] with what's happening in the in the
[57:57] Middle East with the Palestinians and
[57:59] now Iran and I feel like you know having
[58:02] come from a war and seeing this still
[58:05] going on this kind of this kind of you
[58:08] know approach and this kind of like
[58:11] dehumanizing and demonizing another
[58:14] group of people again. You know,
[58:16] Vietnamese people, we were we were
[58:17] demonized as well. And so to see this, I
[58:21] uh there's a part of me that's just so
[58:23] angry.
[58:25] And so I actually this accepting that
[58:28] you know our the people our human family
[58:32] and this is where we are. And it's
[58:35] helped me really transfer this energy
[58:38] first accepting that that there's part
[58:40] of you know relatives in our family. And
[58:44] so it's helped me to really accept them
[58:46] first and not to see and do the same as
[58:50] they're doing to others and say that
[58:51] they are like you know to blame to other
[58:55] them you as not myself but to accept
[58:58] them as that yeah they're part of our
[59:00] human family as well.
[59:04] And it it really it helped me a lot to
[59:06] to sit with that and to and I I did this
[59:09] for like weeks to really accept accept
[59:13] and then now it's fueling me to direct
[59:16] my energy and where do I want to focus
[59:18] it and so for me this is a a way I dealt
[59:22] with it in terms of acceptance first
[59:25] accepting this is it this is what we got
[59:27] this is the culture that we produce
[59:29] these kinds of people and education
[59:32] these are not dumb people. They're very
[59:34] smart, you know. And how did this
[59:36] happen, you know, uh that we are doing
[59:38] this with to children and and schools
[59:41] and using these uh bombs and guns and
[59:45] military things, you know, and yeah, it
[59:47] just pained me from that and but I like,
[59:51] you know, I had to accept it first. So,
[59:53] this is been a very healing thing and
[59:55] now, you know, I think I've moved from
[59:58] that. Now I'm very focused in in my
[1:00:01] energy, you know, where where I want to
[1:00:03] put my mind.
[1:00:05] >> Yeah. I mean, I can completely
[1:00:07] understand. Well, I I I can't actually
[1:00:09] understand, but I can imagine how
[1:00:13] provocative it is for you given the
[1:00:16] history of of your family, uh, your own
[1:00:19] personal history, the history of your
[1:00:21] people
[1:00:22] to to then see it happening to other
[1:00:25] peoples around around the world. Um
[1:00:29] yeah and and the and the fact is if if
[1:00:32] you can even after a period of struggle
[1:00:34] if you can move to acceptance in really
[1:00:39] heightened extreme circumstances uh such
[1:00:42] as the ones you've described well then I
[1:00:44] think I can in the face of my garden
[1:00:48] variety anxiety or little hiccups in an
[1:00:52] otherwise massively privileged life. Um
[1:00:55] yeah, it's doable for me. It's still for
[1:00:58] anybody listening or watching. One thing
[1:01:00] in the spirit of this is it. I think one
[1:01:02] thing that we uh will need to accept is
[1:01:04] that uh we set out to talk about 10 of
[1:01:08] uh your teachers phrases and we got
[1:01:09] through four, but uh the four we did
[1:01:13] cover were
[1:01:15] awesome. Um both the phrases themselves
[1:01:17] and and your your utterances about them.
[1:01:21] So before I let you go, uh let me just
[1:01:23] ask each of you to please promote
[1:01:26] anything you're working on these days
[1:01:27] that you want people to know about. Kyra
[1:01:29] Joel, I'll start with you. Um anything
[1:01:31] you got cooking that people should go
[1:01:33] check out?
[1:01:35] >> Yes, it's it's really at the beginning
[1:01:37] stages, but um but my partner and I were
[1:01:40] offered a monastery in upstate New York.
[1:01:43] Our vision is to renovate it as a
[1:01:46] Buddhist, Christian, and um uh
[1:01:49] earthbased center for contemplation.
[1:01:52] It's it's just an hour from Bluecliffe
[1:01:54] Monastery, one of one of the ones that
[1:01:56] Tay um founded. Our organization is the
[1:01:59] Beloved Community for Engaged
[1:02:01] Spirituality. So, we're right at the
[1:02:04] very beginning of um putting it
[1:02:06] together, but um we hope that it will in
[1:02:09] a few years be able to welcome people
[1:02:12] and also we'll have hermitages where
[1:02:14] people can come and do um solo, you
[1:02:17] know, sort of silent retreats. Uh but
[1:02:20] we'll be having a regular practice
[1:02:22] schedule that people can also join in.
[1:02:25] Um and there'll be a chapel and a
[1:02:27] meditation hall. So both faiths will
[1:02:30] will um be coming together and and more
[1:02:34] than just those two faiths. It'll be a
[1:02:36] place where um where really we're
[1:02:39] looking at how to become mature
[1:02:42] spiritual practitioners that can respond
[1:02:44] to the needs of of this very um very
[1:02:49] suffering world that is um you know in
[1:02:52] some kind of collapse. So what are the
[1:02:55] kind of spiritual wisdoms that we need
[1:02:57] in order to to be responsive in these
[1:03:00] times?
[1:03:01] >> That sounds extraordinary.
[1:03:04] Um, best of luck.
[1:03:05] >> Thank you.
[1:03:07] >> Because it sounds like something that we
[1:03:08] need right now. And brother Fapy Young,
[1:03:10] on your side, anything uh you're putting
[1:03:12] out into the world that we should be uh
[1:03:14] aware of.
[1:03:15] >> Yeah, like I was saying, uh directing my
[1:03:17] energy towards education. Uh this fall
[1:03:20] we'll be opening our first time of the
[1:03:22] school uh taken school of interbeing and
[1:03:26] to re look at education and purpose of
[1:03:28] education. So create an environment
[1:03:31] where children are feel loved cared for
[1:03:35] like a a spiritual family that includes
[1:03:37] their parents. So it's community so
[1:03:39] families come and live. We opening K to
[1:03:43] 4 this time and we want to go to K to 8
[1:03:46] and then eventually K to 12. We already
[1:03:49] have many examples from the retreats
[1:03:51] that we have, family retreats and I have
[1:03:53] and many young people from that system
[1:03:56] have come back and they brought their
[1:03:58] girlfriend, their wives, their husband
[1:04:00] and see how beautiful they are and they
[1:04:03] know they have a compass, a moral
[1:04:05] compass and what is good. So just you
[1:04:08] know one one week a year already. Can
[1:04:10] you imagine like a school year for you
[1:04:14] know so that is for me how we need to
[1:04:17] change the the the structure of society
[1:04:21] and and and and education as well. So I
[1:04:24] think that that is kind of like at the
[1:04:27] root of uh uh what's happening in the
[1:04:30] world. Brother Fap Young, Kyra Julingo,
[1:04:33] thank you both for the incredible work
[1:04:35] you do in the world and for spending
[1:04:37] some time with me and us.
[1:04:40] >> Thank you, Dan.
[1:04:41] >> Always a pleasure.
[1:04:43] >> Thank you very much for listening to the
[1:04:44] show. I really appreciate it. And if you
[1:04:46] enjoy listening to the show, if you get
[1:04:49] anything out of it, please do me a
[1:04:50] solid. Leave a rating or a review. I
[1:04:54] know every podcast host asks for this,
[1:04:56] but it really makes a difference. It
[1:04:58] helps boost the visibility of this show.
[1:05:01] We view this show as a mission to help
[1:05:04] people become nodes of sanity and an
[1:05:06] insane world. And so by taking a minute
[1:05:09] and giving the show a rating or a
[1:05:11] review, you're really helping us out and
[1:05:14] helping us achieve our mission. Thank
[1:05:16] you again. And now on to the credits.
[1:05:19] Thank you so much to everybody who works
[1:05:21] so hard to make this show. 10% Happier
[1:05:23] is produced by Tara Anderson, Marissa
[1:05:26] Schneiderman, DJ Cashmir, David Hart,
[1:05:28] and Hayden Broom. Post-prouction is
[1:05:31] handled by the great folks over at
[1:05:32] Greenhorn Creative, and Nick Thorburn of
[1:05:35] the great indie rock band Islands wrote
[1:05:37] our theme. Thank you for listening.
[1:05:39] Deuces.