Transcript
[0:00] thank you so much Cara for getting us
[0:05] welcoming us all here and it's a joy to
[0:09] be back with all of you I get to teach
[0:12] in this community a couple times a year
[0:15] and it's always wonderful so we'll begin
[0:22] with a meditation and so this meditation
[0:31] will be a practice of connecting with
[0:36] the good wholesome qualities that are in
[0:40] us that are sometimes asleep but that
[0:46] only need to be awakened in order to
[0:49] experience them and to benefit from them
[0:53] and we'll also in the second part of the
[1:00] meditation practice to care for a seed
[1:05] of suffering that may need our attention
[1:08] so if there's maybe a medium to mild
[1:16] difficulty that you're aware of in your
[1:18] life that you'd like to bring into this
[1:21] meditation could also be a big
[1:23] difficulty but I would I would probably
[1:28] discourage you from choosing the most
[1:29] difficult thing just to build up the
[1:34] muscle with something easier first if
[1:36] it's not something you've practiced to
[1:40] meditate with just so you don't get
[1:44] overwhelmed so something that's you know
[1:46] in the relative zone of difficulty will
[1:50] could be an irritation or difficulty
[1:53] with someone or challenge at work or
[1:55] something you're struggling with in in
[1:59] yourself so the first part will be
[2:04] connecting with our strength our our
[2:10] clarity our our
[2:12] and quality or equanimity our freshness
[2:18] bringing up these qualities that we all
[2:21] have and then the second part of the
[2:23] practice will be drawing on this this
[2:28] beauty this clarity in us to help us to
[2:33] hold and massage and care for and
[2:37] embrace something that's needs our
[2:40] attention and needs our care
[2:43] so yeah thank you everyone for being
[2:48] here today and for your your bodhichitta
[2:54] your mind love your aspiration to
[2:58] practice because that is what we need to
[3:02] nourish ourselves and really make the
[3:08] breakthroughs that are possible in our
[3:10] consciousness so just beginning by
[3:15] appreciating ourselves being here and
[3:18] letting ourselves settle in to find a
[3:22] comfortable position
[3:25] we'll be meditating for 30 minutes in
[3:29] this guided way the whole time won't
[3:31] lower together as a meditation but the
[3:34] formal practice will be 30 minutes so
[3:36] choose a position that's gonna be
[3:38] supportive for you sitting you could
[3:41] also choose lying you could also be
[3:44] standing and if your body needs to move
[3:48] like rocking or swaying you know
[3:51] whatever will will really take care of
[3:53] your body
[3:53] and whatever is up for your body today
[4:04] so once you
[4:05] in your position allowing the body to
[4:11] settle so feeling where your body is
[4:17] making touch with the floor with another
[4:23] surface maybe a chair or your bed or a
[4:28] couch or a cushion a wall so noticing
[4:36] the places of contact and as you breathe
[4:49] in feeling these places of contact and
[4:53] as you breathe out releasing the weight
[4:55] of your body up to the support of the
[4:58] earth so that every exhale letting your
[5:04] body rest and sink a little bit deeper
[5:08] into the support that's underneath you
[5:14] around you
[5:41] you're bringing awareness to your
[5:43] forehead and as you exhale let the
[5:49] muscles of the forehead soften release
[5:54] tension and then to the mouth and the
[6:02] jaw the tongue as you inhale and
[6:06] exhaling letting go letting the jaw
[6:12] release and the tongue be soft in the
[6:17] mouth and inhaling into the shoulders
[6:25] and exhaling allowing the shoulders to
[6:29] release get a little heavier I say slow
[6:37] down further down from the ears when
[6:46] breathing in being aware of your arms
[6:48] and hands breathing out letting them
[6:52] rest on your lap or on the floor
[7:05] I'm grading in being aware of your chest
[7:09] and your belly and breathing out letting
[7:13] your chest and belly open and soften
[7:19] releasing tightness tension and
[7:28] breathing into your pelvis the hips the
[7:34] buttocks and breathing out letting this
[7:38] part of the body give itself over to the
[7:41] earth releasing tightness tension and
[7:52] breathing into the legs and the feet
[7:55] when breathing out allowing the legs and
[7:59] feet to rest and let go and being aware
[8:08] of your whole body and your whole body
[8:12] settle come into stillness and rest
[8:32] now I invite you to bring to mind bring
[8:37] into your heart something that you feel
[8:41] grateful for something that is
[8:48] nourishing you in your life bringing you
[8:50] happiness at this moment in time
[9:00] something small something really big
[9:04] important
[9:15] smallest gratitude for the ability to
[9:20] have an internet connection to be able
[9:23] to be on this call something as vast as
[9:31] that there's air to breathe and that we
[9:34] can breathe in and breathe out whatever
[9:39] it is that's arising for you right now
[9:44] what are you grateful for
[9:58] allowing that to fill your yourself fill
[10:04] your body
[10:05] fill your mind the sense of gratitude
[10:35] help our hearts to open like a flower
[10:40] opening to the Sun of wisdom compassion
[10:46] allowing our the flower in our heart to
[10:49] open to radiate getting in touch with
[10:57] the energy of freshness in our lives
[11:04] touching the quality we each have to
[11:09] look at life with fresh eyes the
[11:13] beginner's mind perhaps even visualizing
[11:18] a flower if that's helpful for you or
[11:26] seeing yourself as a flower rooted in
[11:30] the earth and this beautiful colorful
[11:34] blossom opening up to the sky and
[11:45] bringing to mind something that creates
[11:48] this feeling of energy aliveness
[11:52] freshness for you in your life maybe
[11:56] it's something you like to do like
[11:58] swimming or horse riding or taking a
[12:01] shower or walking along the ocean
[12:05] holding hands with someone you love
[12:09] laughing children gardening petting your
[12:16] dog or cat playing a sport - whatever it
[12:23] is that gets you in touch with this
[12:25] feeling of vitality of interest
[12:30] curiosity being in the flow of life
[12:37] offering yourself being engaged
[12:46] freshness so seeing yourself in that
[12:51] situation allowing yourself to feel all
[12:56] the things you would feel in that moment
[12:58] aliveness and freshness and curiosity
[13:03] and interest if it is particularly
[13:22] perceptible in a particular part of your
[13:25] body then allowing your attention to
[13:27] rest in that part of your body where you
[13:30] notice freshness and energy breathing
[13:38] that in and out letting yourself bask
[13:43] and bathe in this quality of freshness
[13:54] of being a flower sharing yourself with
[13:59] with the world offering your beauty your
[14:05] strength your fragrance
[14:17] taking a few breaths quietly as we just
[14:20] enjoy being human flowers
[15:05] I invite you to bring to mind the image
[15:10] of a mountain and we're going to see
[15:16] ourselves as mountains as well so a
[15:20] mountain is solid and stable and
[15:25] immovable and so are we the same quality
[15:31] exists in each of us the stability the
[15:33] steadiness so you can visualize your
[15:39] head as the peak of the mountain your
[15:42] shoulders your torso as the sides of the
[15:46] mountain
[15:47] and the base of your body as the feet
[15:49] the foot of the mountain base and feel
[15:56] yourself maybe growing even more erect
[15:58] ooh getting a little taller embodying
[16:05] stability in your posture
[16:14] breathing in this quality of the
[16:19] mountain and breathing out the reality
[16:25] of our stability of our study 'no
[16:31] solidity seeing ourselves as a mountain
[16:40] experiencing stability in every cell of
[16:45] our body
[17:23] in the face of storms and very violent
[17:30] weather grave difficulties mountain
[17:38] doesn't shake my mouth we have that same
[17:45] capacity to bear and endure and remain
[17:52] stable in the midst of the storms of
[17:55] life without being pushed over we have
[18:06] the capacity to provide stability and
[18:11] strength to others when they need
[18:13] strength
[18:14] that's our Mountain nature letting
[18:19] yourself rest in the mountain that you
[18:23] are then take refuge in that
[19:16] to the quality of spaciousness to
[19:20] cultivate that quality in us so
[19:27] visualizing yourself like a bird flying
[19:31] in the sky I like the full moon sailing
[19:38] through the night sky there's so much
[19:42] space around you and a very deep sense
[19:48] of freedom there no obstacle is nothing
[19:53] constraining you vast space surrounding
[19:58] you maybe you're sitting on the top of a
[20:07] high mountain and when you can see all
[20:09] around miles and miles in every
[20:14] direction the sense of unboundedness of
[20:21] limitless space breathing in that sense
[20:28] of space and breathing out with freedom
[20:36] experiencing freedom inside and around
[20:40] us space free
[21:33] so the experience of freedom is always
[21:37] available to us the wisdom that there is
[21:43] space inside and around us it's always
[21:47] there sometimes it's asleep in the
[21:51] depths of our mind and we feel tight and
[21:54] constricted and stressed and under
[21:57] strain but even in those moments we can
[22:01] touch that seed in the soil of our mind
[22:04] you can remember what it feels like to
[22:10] be completely unrestricted unrestrained
[22:16] to have so much space and time and
[22:22] possibility so we're practicing that now
[22:27] so that it is available to us when we
[22:30] need it
[22:33] breathing in space
[22:37] breathing out free
[22:50] dwelling in freedom
[23:10] for this space and freedom to others as
[23:12] well that's the meaning of true love is
[23:18] to give someone space the freedom to be
[23:24] who they are we learn to offer it to
[23:30] ourselves and to those we love everyone
[23:53] so now to a very brief tending to
[24:00] suffering so I invite you to bring to
[24:05] mind the situation in your life that is
[24:10] causing you difficulty that's
[24:12] challenging for you and noticing as you
[24:21] bring it to mind how it feels in your
[24:26] body as you bring this person this
[24:30] situation may be this aspect of yourself
[24:33] to mind
[24:46] see if you can connect with where you
[24:49] notice this in the body and what the
[24:55] qualities of this challenge is
[24:58] difficulty the suffering are is it
[25:03] something quite fuzzy kind of something
[25:14] confused or hazy is it something too
[25:18] sharp and painful is it cold is it hot
[25:22] is it moving around is it something
[25:25] solid and stuck like a big block I said
[25:31] a tingle is it a groaning is it like
[25:40] sludge like something grimy so getting a
[25:49] sense for the quality of this difficulty
[25:54] and where you feel it in your body
[26:06] and with all of the resources that we
[26:14] just connected with our freshness are
[26:17] solid at East ability or spaciousness
[26:20] and freedom bringing an embrace to this
[26:26] challenge of allowing it to be here
[26:33] maybe putting it in your heart or
[26:37] allowing it to be surrounded by these
[26:41] strengths that you also know you have so
[26:49] not pushing it away not denying it and
[26:52] also not becoming carried away by it
[26:57] and over identifying with it that that's
[27:02] me I'm this really difficult thing that
[27:05] I'm experiencing that's all I am
[27:09] allowing it to be here it's a tender
[27:13] suffering hurting part of our self maybe
[27:20] it's angry
[27:21] maybe it's feeling despair so opening
[27:26] ourselves to really feel it and be with
[27:29] it giving it space to be here
[27:43] you can hold it in our arms like we
[27:47] would a an upset child with kindness
[27:53] with compassion breathing in with the
[27:58] breathing out with it knowing our breath
[28:00] will help this upset child to come and
[28:04] to feel some relief we can let it know
[28:14] it's okay that you're here and it's okay
[28:17] that you're upset you don't have to be
[28:22] in a good mood to suit me you can be
[28:25] just the way you are a gentle honouring
[28:36] of this painful part of ourselves
[29:05] there
[29:06] compassionately embracing holding this
[29:11] painful spot in us I'm here for you you
[29:21] might say I'm taking good care of you
[29:29] just being here with you
[29:35] mindfully staying present offering my
[29:42] attention allow you to be to feel what
[29:47] you need me to feel just being here with
[29:51] you not leaving you alone or pushing you
[29:55] away holding you lovingly
[30:17] maybe this painful part of you begins to
[30:20] relax just a little bit or feel more
[30:23] ease and if not that's okay continuing
[30:33] to honor it and be there with this and
[30:37] then asking it what does it need from
[30:40] you in this moment what would it like
[30:42] how would it like to be met right now
[30:49] just listening
[31:20] then whatever that is that you might
[31:23] sense this part of you needs from you
[31:26] seeing if you can offer it to this part
[31:28] of your song now we're in the future
[31:32] just affirming and you will will try you
[31:37] will respond
[31:52] few breaths now as we just feel into
[31:56] this experience now what's happening in
[32:01] the body what might have shifted
[32:06] what is this emotion experiencing now or
[32:11] how has it changed it might have turned
[32:16] into something else so being present to
[32:19] what's alive in the body and the
[32:22] emotional field right now
[32:35] knowing we can return to take good care
[32:40] of this part of ourselves at any point
[32:44] their meditation or you know quiet
[32:48] moment during the day but we'll say
[32:50] goodbye to this part of ourselves from
[32:52] now and let it know that we're going to
[32:55] continue to take good care of it and to
[32:58] listen to what it needs so opening to
[33:13] that sense of spaciousness and freedom
[33:15] once again touching back in to the
[33:20] quality of a mountain and stability and
[33:27] coming back to the nature of flower
[33:31] nests of freshness of aliveness energy
[33:35] curiosity openness that's always there
[33:39] in us as well
[33:42] reading all of that in knowing that is
[33:45] is who we are you can always access that
[33:52] breathing that out to share with the
[33:54] world and as you're ready you can gently
[34:00] open your eyes if you have them closed
[34:03] in transition back to our book together
[34:14] thank you for your practice
[34:23] so feel free to take a moment to gently
[34:27] stretch take a care of yourself
[34:40] and so I want to share on the theme of
[34:52] our call today which is understanding
[34:56] our minds healing blocks of suffering
[35:00] and the individual and collective
[35:02] consciousness so I want to share about a
[35:10] teaching that's been really helpful for
[35:13] me that I learned from tick not Hanh my
[35:18] teacher about how our minds work and he
[35:25] talks about there being many layers of
[35:30] our mind and I had wanted to draw a
[35:32] diagram that I didn't get paper I've
[35:37] been on a retreat so so so he draws on
[35:42] the board the circle and he and then he
[35:45] draws a line across so there's an upper
[35:47] and a lower level and so the lower level
[35:52] is the store consciousness is what we
[35:57] might call the basement of a house where
[36:02] we keep all these things and the upper
[36:05] level is called mind consciousness and
[36:08] that is like the living room it's like
[36:12] where the things in the basement if you
[36:14] bring them into the living room then
[36:16] they have life so they come to life so
[36:21] if you keep your record player in the
[36:24] basement when you bring it to the living
[36:25] room you put on a record and it starts
[36:28] to play music so another way of thinking
[36:32] of these two layers is like soil in a
[36:35] garden so under the so
[36:36] are these seeds and when a seed is
[36:40] watered it sprouts up and it manifests
[36:43] at the level of the mind
[36:45] so according to Buddhist psychology
[36:48] there are 51 or some traditions say 52
[36:54] different numbers but there you know a
[36:58] variety of seeds in the depths of our
[37:01] minds and we all have all the same seeds
[37:03] we all have wholesome seeds
[37:05] we all have unwholesome seeds so we have
[37:08] a wholesome seeds are like our
[37:12] generosity ARFF exceed of forgiveness
[37:14] our seed of mindfulness of compassion of
[37:18] equanimity of insight of concentration
[37:22] our seed of being practicing ethically
[37:26] being honest seed of a sense of humor of
[37:31] being able to let go and then
[37:35] unwholesome seeds we all have all the
[37:38] same unwholesome seeds of discrimination
[37:42] of violence of judgment of hatred of
[37:46] ignorance of greed of dishonesty here
[37:56] being closed off and then there are some
[38:02] seats that are indeterminate that depend
[38:04] on the situation whether they're
[38:05] wholesome or unwholesome one example is
[38:08] sleepiness like it can be wholesome one
[38:10] we really need to rest sometimes
[38:12] sleepiness is there as a way to avoid
[38:14] things as a way to shut down and in that
[38:17] case it's more unwholesome so we all
[38:22] have all these seeds so that I find
[38:29] teaching just a loan very liberating to
[38:31] know that when I get angry when I get
[38:33] insecure when I get jealous that that's
[38:36] not something particularly wrong or bad
[38:38] about me but that's part of the human
[38:41] condition that everyone has that's heat
[38:44] and some seeds in us may be stronger
[38:46] than others because of our ancestors the
[38:50] ways we were raised but in our culture
[38:52] and our in our communities certain seeds
[38:56] got watered without our choosing we may
[39:02] have a big seed of fear if people around
[39:08] us had a lot of fear or watered that
[39:11] seed of fear and us told us that we
[39:13] weren't safe or we couldn't do things or
[39:16] made us feel more insecure so that seed
[39:19] might be bigger depending on our our
[39:24] particular history other seeds might be
[39:29] smaller
[39:30] maybe maybe our seed of of confidence or
[39:36] if joy is really big because of how we
[39:38] were encouraged to be and the things in
[39:42] us that people saw and nourished and
[39:49] what's so important about our
[39:51] mindfulness practice is so what happens
[39:54] at the dynamic of how these seeds work
[39:56] is they're they're asleep under the
[39:59] under the surface in the store
[40:02] consciousness and in the upper level of
[40:08] our mind were we're always taking in
[40:11] sense impressions through the sense
[40:13] doors so if you think of that upper
[40:15] layer of the mind having like five
[40:18] doorways so there's a doorway of the ear
[40:20] as the door of the nose doorway of the
[40:22] mouth doorway of touch during of eyes
[40:29] all
[40:31] things are coming into our mind all the
[40:32] time and we're also producing thoughts
[40:34] in our mind from within and all those
[40:37] things are falling down into the depths
[40:39] of our mind and watering certain seeds
[40:41] so the things we see we hear we touch we
[40:44] taste we smell and the things we think
[40:47] those are the six senses in Buddhism all
[40:49] those things are nourishing seeds in the
[40:52] depths of our mind all the time so we
[40:55] want to know which seeds are getting
[40:57] watered because we are often
[40:59] unconsciously watering unwholesome seeds
[41:02] we're watering seeds of fear seeds of
[41:05] doubt seeds of craving seeds of
[41:10] discrimination seeds of violence I have
[41:14] a friend who mentioned that she when
[41:17] she'd go shopping she would always look
[41:20] at the magazines at the checkout line
[41:24] they always had these magazines so she'd
[41:26] just look at the ones regular magazines
[41:28] and she would notice after looking
[41:32] through them that she wouldn't feel very
[41:34] good about her body about her body image
[41:37] so just subtly just looking at pictures
[41:40] of these supermodels and women you know
[41:43] yeah you know fitting into this very
[41:51] unattainable image of what a woman
[41:55] should look like that she would not feel
[41:57] good about herself so she decided to
[41:59] stop she consciously decided to not look
[42:02] at those magazines as she'd go through
[42:03] the checkout line and she noticed she
[42:08] felt better about herself so that's just
[42:10] a little example of all the different
[42:13] sense impressions which is a kind of
[42:16] food right we eat food but we also
[42:18] another kind of food are all the things
[42:21] that we consume through our senses
[42:23] throughout the day you want to really
[42:26] check out how those things are
[42:27] nourishing the seeds in under the soil
[42:31] because the key to our liberation is how
[42:37] we take care of those seeds in the store
[42:39] of our mind so
[42:44] if we have a seed of fear under the soil
[42:49] and we water it it arises into the mind
[42:55] consciousness into the living room and
[42:56] it it's an actual energy it's no longer
[42:58] a potential that's asleep under the soil
[43:00] it becomes the energy of fear and we
[43:03] feel all the hormones all the neuro
[43:09] chemicals that get released in our body
[43:12] that cause us to go into fight flight
[43:15] freeze you know our life can get
[43:20] shortened by constantly nourishing fear
[43:23] it can cause aging to happen faster it
[43:26] can depress our immune system it can so
[43:30] all these things happen when fear arises
[43:33] in the mind that change our body
[43:36] chemistry and it has a real effect on us
[43:38] we start to look at things in a certain
[43:40] way start to see things that might not
[43:42] be there because we're so afraid and
[43:44] misperceive so when we nourish fear in
[43:48] the mind consciousness in the upper
[43:50] level of the mind when fear is allowed
[43:53] to be there for five minutes or 10
[43:55] minutes the seed of fear in the root in
[43:58] the store consciousness so that root of
[44:02] fear at the seed level gets five or ten
[44:05] minutes of food and it gets a little bit
[44:06] bigger so the next day or the next week
[44:10] when some something happens that seed of
[44:13] fear arises faster and it's more intense
[44:17] and it lasts longer
[44:19] so we experience ourselves becoming more
[44:24] fearful the more we consume things that
[44:26] feed the seed of fear and the more we
[44:28] allow it to be up in the mind with a
[44:31] more air time we give it on this radio
[44:34] station then the stronger it gets in the
[44:38] more it manifests spontaneously all by
[44:40] itself so you can see how it can create
[44:44] a vicious cycle of the more fearful we
[44:46] become the more we experience fear and
[44:50] the more we experience fear the more
[44:51] fearful we we get and so on and on we
[44:54] become more and more fearful
[44:57] so there's another way to do things
[45:03] right and we all know right maybe we
[45:09] ourselves I have a certain seed that
[45:13] we've allowed to become very strong
[45:14] that's unwholesome maybe we've nourished
[45:18] the seed of anger a lot or nourished the
[45:20] seed of sadness or the seed of
[45:25] self-doubt or the seed of judgment
[45:32] judging others we know where that goal
[45:37] is right that we nourish that seed and
[45:39] it comes up and it does not make us
[45:41] happy it takes over the living room and
[45:43] it colors the whole of our mind escape
[45:46] it's like we shut that just curtains we
[45:50] you know everything gets very dreary
[45:53] when that unwholesome emotion has taken
[45:55] over so we want to bring in mindfulness
[46:03] and we all have the seed of mindfulness
[46:05] this is a beautiful thing and one of the
[46:10] most beautiful things is one of the
[46:12] conditions for mindfulness arising in
[46:14] the mind is previous moments of
[46:16] mindfulness so every time we practice
[46:19] noticing our breath noticing our body
[46:23] noticing what's happening in our
[46:26] emotions taking a pause they just feel
[46:29] what's here or what's happening that
[46:33] nourishes the seed of mindfulness it
[46:35] gets bigger it gets more likely to arise
[46:38] it's stronger it will last longer when
[46:41] it does arise and it'll be more intense
[46:44] so we can cultivate mindfulness we can
[46:46] cultivate all of the wholesome seeds we
[46:50] can consume foods through our senses
[46:54] through our sights through you know
[46:56] through our eyes or our ears or nose
[46:58] that nourish the seeds that we want to
[47:00] nourish in us of compassion of clarity
[47:04] of stillness of presence we
[47:09] should nourish them every day that is
[47:11] what the Buddha taught we should nourish
[47:13] the whole Sun men avoid nourishing the
[47:16] unwholesome we can do that every day so
[47:19] when when we nourish the wholesome when
[47:22] an unwholesome state arises we can do
[47:24] something about it we don't need to let
[47:26] that unwholesome seed take over and make
[47:29] us do things that we don't want to do
[47:30] which is often what happens so when an
[47:34] unwholesome seed arises like fear it's
[47:39] like this seed has come up and it's now
[47:42] manifesting above the ground above the
[47:45] soil so then we call up mindfulness as
[47:47] soon as we notice you know that this has
[47:50] entered the living room we need adult
[47:51] supervision in there so we bring up
[47:53] mindfulness and mindfulness doesn't
[47:56] fight our fear it doesn't push away our
[47:58] fear it doesn't judge our fear doesn't
[48:00] say why are you feeling that way that's
[48:01] that's not who I want to be that's not
[48:02] who I am
[48:03] mindfulness doesn't do that mindfulness
[48:06] has no preference what it's going to be
[48:09] mindful of is happy to be mindful of our
[48:11] joy it's happy to be mindful of our
[48:13] equanimity is happy to be mindful of our
[48:15] fear of our self hatred of our jealousy
[48:19] it doesn't care it wants to just be with
[48:21] whatever is so mindfulness comes and it
[48:24] embraces our fear and it says oh I see
[48:28] you fear first of all it recognizes fear
[48:30] is here and then it says oh it's okay
[48:34] you can be here it doesn't push pure
[48:36] away just like we did in the meditation
[48:38] and mindfulness says I'm here for you
[48:41] I'm offering you my presence I'm being
[48:45] here for you
[48:46] and breathe with it and we try not to
[48:49] get into the story relying of it
[48:51] thinking about it why am i fearful I
[48:54] shouldn't be fearful or what happened
[48:56] how can I stop this coming about no we
[48:58] just experienced the fear and be with it
[49:01] we feel in our body we notice that we
[49:03] breathe with it we allow mindfulness to
[49:05] give it space and to inquire into how
[49:09] does it feel what is it like at the body
[49:11] level and can I be with it can I just
[49:15] allow it and mindfulness has the
[49:19] capacity to hold hold it sometimes our
[49:22] mindfulness isn't strong
[49:23] if the block of suffering that arises is
[49:26] so big it may not we might not have a
[49:29] strong enough mindfulness so then we
[49:31] need to find a teacher find a community
[49:33] find a friend find a therapist a group
[49:39] of people that that have mindfulness and
[49:41] we can draw on their mindfulness to
[49:44] strengthen ours so we can be there with
[49:47] this painful emotion with the seed
[49:50] that's arisen I have done that I have
[49:53] asked people to help me hold a really
[49:56] difficult emotion so mindfulness holds
[50:00] it and as it holds it because all these
[50:02] parts of ourselves they're they're so
[50:04] used to being pushed away because that's
[50:06] our first inclination is to avoid
[50:09] anything painful so our tendency is
[50:11] either vent and express and explode into
[50:16] whatever this emotion is so we
[50:19] completely identify with it it runs away
[50:21] with us or we suppress it those are the
[50:24] two usual paths we take but mindfulness
[50:26] is a third middle path of being with it
[50:29] not letting it take us over and also not
[50:32] suppressing it so that's exactly what
[50:37] the parts in us that are in pain want
[50:39] and need just like a child that's crying
[50:42] or that's upset they don't really want
[50:45] to be left alone they don't want to be
[50:47] judged or yelled at for being upset but
[50:50] all they really want is to be held to be
[50:53] spoken to with kindness to be accepted
[50:56] for how they are they don't want to be
[50:59] fixed they don't want to be told they're
[51:00] wrong shut in the closet they just want
[51:04] to be held and if you think about
[51:06] yourself as a child or you know other
[51:08] children what happens when they're held
[51:11] when they're soothed by someone who
[51:14] cares
[51:15] usually they calm down if they're not
[51:19] being yelled at or told to stuff it they
[51:24] start to settle down because that the
[51:26] nervous system of whoever is holding
[51:29] them soothing them starts to calm the
[51:32] nervous system of a child so that's
[51:34] exactly what happens when mindfulness
[51:36] to embrace fear or any painful emotion
[51:40] it starts to let that part of ourself
[51:42] know it's okay that it's there because
[51:44] it's a part of us so it starts to calm
[51:46] it starts to settle and then it starts
[51:50] to reveal itself to us so at that point
[51:53] when the emotion is beginning to settle
[51:55] then we can begin to enquire and look
[51:59] deeply to understand it and then often
[52:03] all by itself we don't even need to do
[52:05] much suddenly it's just this awareness
[52:07] is there of like oh I see this fear
[52:10] comes from the situation I experienced a
[52:15] long time ago not just what I'm
[52:16] experiencing in the present moment or
[52:19] this is my mother's fear or my father's
[52:22] fear or my community's fear or you may
[52:29] understand something about it that we
[52:31] hadn't understood before that helps us
[52:33] to be a little more free and so then
[52:39] that seed of fear it comes back it comes
[52:42] back into the form of a seed so the
[52:44] emotion that was alive is now weaker
[52:47] weaker weaker it comes back to the form
[52:49] of a seed and every time we do the
[52:50] process of bathing our painful emotions
[52:54] with mindfulness the seed in the
[52:57] storehouse becomes smaller that's the
[53:00] beautiful thing we can affect these
[53:02] scenes in the store of our mind so in a
[53:05] fearful situation with that smaller seed
[53:08] we're less likely to become fearful and
[53:10] I've seen the seed of fear is activated
[53:13] and arises it will be less intense and
[53:15] it will last less long it won't be there
[53:18] as long so you can see how we can
[53:21] cultivate a lot more happiness a lot
[53:24] more well-being by how we take care of
[53:26] these mind states when they arise and
[53:28] how we avoid watering them now we don't
[53:31] let them arise to begin with if we can
[53:34] and sometimes we can't so when they do
[53:37] arise if we take care of them right away
[53:39] they come back and they're transformed
[53:45] they're you know it doesn't mean it goes
[53:47] away just one time you do that and then
[53:49] you don't have this EF here anymore
[53:50] it's a long time it takes to transform
[53:53] the seat of fear but slowly every time
[53:55] you do that we get smaller smaller
[53:58] smaller and less and less likely to
[54:03] disturb our mind in in unwholesome ways
[54:12] so I also want to mention that there
[54:15] there are sometimes blocks of suffering
[54:17] in our consciousness that have
[54:21] accumulated over time especially if we
[54:25] practice suppressing so maybe something
[54:28] has happened that was difficult for us
[54:29] in our childhood or maybe something
[54:31] happened in the people who took care of
[54:34] us in their lives and that got
[54:36] transmitted to us even though it didn't
[54:38] happen to us but we have that same block
[54:42] in our consciousness and this is more
[54:44] than just a little speed of suffering
[54:45] it's like a big clump of suffering part
[54:50] of the reason why many of us keep the
[54:53] upper level of our minds constantly full
[54:55] of stimulation is because a part of us
[54:59] knows unconsciously or subconsciously
[55:02] that there is this block of suffering
[55:04] under down in the basement and so we're
[55:08] always doing things we stay busy we we
[55:13] always have to read a newspaper when we
[55:16] have free time or we look at our phones
[55:18] and we're listening to music or watch TV
[55:20] or we listen to the news or we need to
[55:23] talk to people or we have to go shopping
[55:25] or we have to eat something we have to
[55:28] do do-do-do do-do-do so that there's no
[55:30] quiet still space in our mind because
[55:35] when there is that block of suffering
[55:39] rises because it's needing attention
[55:41] it's needing our care so it doesn't
[55:44] arise during the day guess what it'll
[55:46] come up in our dreams and we'll have a
[55:48] nightmare or we'll have some memory
[55:50] something arises in our dreams because
[55:53] this block of suffering is down there
[55:56] it's a presence it's alive it's needing
[56:00] to be seen and recognized
[56:03] but what often happens is we will avoid
[56:07] it so we'll fill up our mind with
[56:10] everything we can to not feel it and
[56:13] sometimes that manifests in addictive
[56:15] pattern so we might you know turn to
[56:18] drinking in order to not feel that we
[56:20] might turn to drugs we might turn to a
[56:24] sexual addiction or a shopping addiction
[56:27] or become addicted to our work or
[56:30] extreme sports or something so that we
[56:34] get so focused on something sensational
[56:38] and external that we don't have to feel
[56:40] that block of suffering that's always
[56:42] under there and asking to be seen if we
[56:50] keep doing that the thing the thing
[56:51] about that avoiding pattern is often the
[56:54] things we turn to say it's sadness
[56:58] that's this big block of suffering may
[57:00] be some kind of even depression we might
[57:04] turn to things that make us sad like
[57:08] listening to sad music or reading things
[57:10] that are really sad or maybe we have
[57:12] some fear in there that block of
[57:15] suffering is some unresolved trauma
[57:18] something we're deeply afraid of we
[57:21] might turn to like reading really like
[57:23] scary books horror books horror movies
[57:26] that water the seed of fear often the
[57:31] things we use to avoid the suffering end
[57:33] up watering that same block of suffering
[57:36] we don't intend that to happen but
[57:39] that's often what does happen so if we
[57:42] have a seed of shame
[57:43] then we become addicted to a substance
[57:46] we drink to avoid it and then after when
[57:52] we have that hangover and we're no
[57:55] longer drunk
[57:55] we feel more ashamed and that just
[57:59] nourishes the shame and then we want to
[58:01] drink more and we feel more ashamed and
[58:03] so at a certain point that block of
[58:06] suffering gets so big because of how
[58:07] we're not intentionally that it bursts
[58:11] through into mind consciousness and we
[58:15] find ourselves
[58:16] in a really deep difficulty with a
[58:19] breakdown with a burnout with you know
[58:24] needing needing to be hospitalized one
[58:29] you know completely shutting down like
[58:31] we just can't function because that
[58:34] block of suffering has taken over so
[58:37] that's very dangerous when taking out
[58:40] Han draws this diagram he draws a thick
[58:44] line between mind and store
[58:46] consciousness when we try to avoid the
[58:48] block of suffering and we keep our mind
[58:50] consciousness always occupied he draws a
[58:53] thick line between mind and story it's
[58:55] like we create an embargo won't let
[58:58] anything in store consciousness arise so
[59:01] not only do we not have access we cannot
[59:04] feel the pain down there we're numbing
[59:06] ourselves but we also can't feel our joy
[59:09] and this is something neuroscience has
[59:11] found also that when you try to numb one
[59:14] you can't just numb one part of your
[59:15] brain if you numb one part you numb at
[59:18] all so you get numb to everything so it
[59:22] becomes a very dangerous situation of
[59:24] poor circulation in our psyche you start
[59:28] to cut off parts of ourselves so then
[59:33] inevitably there's going to be a deep
[59:36] imbalance that's going to manifest in
[59:39] some kind of physical illness some kind
[59:41] of mental illness some interpersonal
[59:44] breakdown happens where you just end up
[59:47] you know destroying a relationship
[59:51] suddenly because that thing sprouts out
[59:54] into your mind and you say things you do
[59:56] things that you regret and could change
[59:58] your life or their life forever but that
[1:00:02] doesn't have to be that way we can
[1:00:04] restore the circulation in our psyche by
[1:00:07] doing that exact process I mentioned we
[1:00:10] can slowly first of all we need to stop
[1:00:13] consuming things in the surface on the
[1:00:16] in the living room we need to stop
[1:00:18] having the living room be 100% full all
[1:00:24] the time day in and day out we need to
[1:00:26] create space so
[1:00:30] coming into places of meditative
[1:00:33] stillness silence being in nature
[1:00:37] turning down the technology turning offs
[1:00:40] having some technological sabbaticals
[1:00:44] not running away but beginning to turn
[1:00:48] towards these parts of ourselves that
[1:00:50] need our care resourcing ourselves first
[1:00:54] through learning mindfulness learning
[1:00:56] body practices that help us be in our
[1:00:58] body yoga Qigong Tai Chi different
[1:01:01] things running of being in nature
[1:01:04] singing dancing moving resting eating
[1:01:12] eating with awareness so all these
[1:01:14] things help us just clear out all of
[1:01:17] that a lot of its garbage a lot of it
[1:01:21] you don't need I don't feel I need to
[1:01:23] hear the same news story of six times in
[1:01:25] a day right that's a lot of us consume
[1:01:28] same story over and over and over and
[1:01:30] over again why sometimes it's to avoid
[1:01:33] these things so we clear out that and
[1:01:37] then we begin to slowly allow the block
[1:01:39] of suffering to emerge and hold it with
[1:01:43] mindfulness and care for it
[1:01:45] and take good care of it and restore
[1:01:49] that circulation every time a piece of
[1:01:51] it can come up and be bathed and
[1:01:53] mindfulness it goes back down it's
[1:01:55] smaller and so it's like we're digesting
[1:01:58] that part of our lives that hasn't been
[1:02:01] able to be digested and slowly it
[1:02:04] reduces it reduces it reduces and it's
[1:02:06] no longer this part of ourselves that is
[1:02:09] hidden that we're ashamed of that we
[1:02:11] can't tell anyone about or that we can't
[1:02:15] even look at our look at clearly
[1:02:18] ourselves we begin to integrate it we
[1:02:20] begin to see well this is a part of who
[1:02:22] I am it's okay I can I can forgive I can
[1:02:28] honor that this has been my journey and
[1:02:31] it's it can teach us a lot those blocks
[1:02:34] of suffering actually become the lotuses
[1:02:36] of our enlightenment they're not
[1:02:38] something that we want to throw away
[1:02:40] they're actually
[1:02:41] the very things that help us to awaken
[1:02:43] and to develop our compassion or joy or
[1:02:47] love or a can equanimity so that we can
[1:02:51] you know honor other people when they're
[1:02:53] in though that deep difficulty we can we
[1:02:56] can see them
[1:02:57] as being on a journey that they can also
[1:03:00] transform they can also learn to love
[1:03:02] and and and honor themselves and care
[1:03:06] for themselves and care for others
[1:03:08] so no part of ourselves should ever be
[1:03:11] thought of as needing to be thrown away
[1:03:14] there's no garbage there's only compost
[1:03:16] right so this beautiful phrase no mud no
[1:03:20] lotus the Lotus only grows in mud Lotus
[1:03:23] is the symbol of awakening norsu mud is
[1:03:25] our suffering
[1:03:26] so the Lotus the awakening comes out of
[1:03:30] the suffering so we don't want to throw
[1:03:32] it away we don't want to push it away so
[1:03:38] I'm gonna pause there I wanted to also
[1:03:43] talk about collective suffering and how
[1:03:47] we can heal collective blocks of
[1:03:49] suffering maybe we'll get to that in the
[1:03:50] Q&A but I'll pause here and invite you
[1:03:54] to share any questions that you might
[1:03:59] have oh and before we go to that I want
[1:04:05] to just share again that worldwide
[1:04:10] insight offers an invaluable opportunity
[1:04:14] for people to connect live to Dharma
[1:04:17] teachings from anywhere in the world so
[1:04:20] if everyone gives a small donation it
[1:04:23] would really help support me and the
[1:04:24] other teachers each week and the
[1:04:27] considerable costs of worldwide insight
[1:04:29] which can only continue with your
[1:04:31] support so please offer Donna using the
[1:04:34] button below the video and I also want
[1:04:39] to ask Cara could you put the link in
[1:04:44] for the course again there's some people
[1:04:46] who joined since you introduced it I
[1:04:52] actually didn't see it the first
[1:04:54] so maybe you could put in the link for
[1:04:56] how to join the course that I'll be
[1:04:59] teaching starting next next week it's on
[1:05:03] the brahma vihara z' the four aspects of
[1:05:09] true love's taught by the Buddha but the
[1:05:11] course is called moving from separation
[1:05:14] to authentic connection and it will
[1:05:16] cover some of the things I just put in
[1:05:18] the link I found it it'll cover many of
[1:05:22] the things we were talking about today
[1:05:23] going deeper into how we can really
[1:05:26] learn to love ourselves and others so
[1:05:29] [Music]
[1:05:30] consider joining us so I see oh great
[1:05:36] Thank You Cara I beat you to it so
[1:05:40] here's a question great I'm just gonna
[1:05:47] make sure I'm recording okay so thank
[1:05:52] you for this question how can we heal
[1:05:54] our collective blocks of suffering so
[1:05:59] just like we have blocks of suffering in
[1:06:02] our individual consciousness we have a
[1:06:06] collective consciousness right we're all
[1:06:10] influenced by the collective
[1:06:11] consciousness if we enter a place where
[1:06:15] many people are practicing peace and
[1:06:18] serenity and joy that starts to affect
[1:06:20] us and we begin to feel those emotions
[1:06:23] if we enter a place where there's people
[1:06:26] and they're feeling a lot of fear or a
[1:06:28] lot of anger a lot of stress that also
[1:06:32] starts to communicate to our nervous
[1:06:34] systems we have these mirror neurons in
[1:06:36] our brains that we pick up what other
[1:06:38] people are feeling and you begin to feel
[1:06:40] that so we say stress is contagious
[1:06:43] right if you're in an office or
[1:06:44] workplace and someone's super stressed
[1:06:46] out tends to other people's shoulders
[1:06:48] tend to start going up towards their
[1:06:50] ears but similarly relaxation ease
[1:06:55] tranquility peace those are contagious -
[1:06:58] you're around someone who's radiating
[1:07:01] this sense of peace and ease and you
[1:07:03] start to feel that as well
[1:07:06] that's why we practiced together with
[1:07:08] others that's why this kind of call is
[1:07:10] so important to be together with others
[1:07:14] so we have a collective consciousness
[1:07:16] and so there are blocks of suffering in
[1:07:19] the collective as well there's
[1:07:21] intergenerational trauma there's
[1:07:23] collective trauma there's a wonderful
[1:07:27] resource that I ran into recently it was
[1:07:30] in October there was an online
[1:07:32] collective trauma summit one of the
[1:07:37] organizer was Thomas Huebel a teacher in
[1:07:40] Germany he had many different presenters
[1:07:43] but one of the things he talked about
[1:07:45] was how we actually live in societies
[1:07:47] that are shaped by unhealed trauma like
[1:07:50] our institutions reflect previous
[1:07:54] generations unhealed trauma so I I'm
[1:07:58] from the US if I think about the way is
[1:08:02] my education system public education
[1:08:05] system in the US the medical system in
[1:08:07] the u.s. the military the economic
[1:08:13] system well there's certainly many
[1:08:15] things that work well and there are many
[1:08:17] people in these systems that have very
[1:08:20] good intentions and lots of compassion
[1:08:22] and lots of clarity and insight there's
[1:08:26] a lot of dysfunction in these systems as
[1:08:28] well that is results from unhealed
[1:08:32] trauma of the people who founded these
[1:08:35] systems I mean our my country was
[1:08:37] founded on slavery you know it was
[1:08:43] founded by people who owned other people
[1:08:46] and they were talking about freedom very
[1:08:51] very from the from the very first the
[1:08:55] DNA of this country there was a ID
[1:09:04] scored between the intention and what
[1:09:06] was actually being done and lived by
[1:09:09] people there was a being out of harmony
[1:09:13] out of coherence it was unco hereand to
[1:09:17] think of starting a country on the basis
[1:09:20] of liberty for all well while some were
[1:09:22] holding others humans captive and
[1:09:26] dehumanizing them so so we have you know
[1:09:32] a society that's been formed by unhealed
[1:09:37] trauma and one generations Tomas Huebel
[1:09:44] was speaking about one generations
[1:09:45] trauma being like snow that falls and
[1:09:48] because it doesn't get healed it doesn't
[1:09:49] get understood or metabolized and it
[1:09:51] freezes and then the next generations
[1:09:54] trauma is snow and that sticks to the
[1:09:56] first layer of snow so at this you get
[1:09:59] this huge impact impacted mass of frozen
[1:10:04] trauma from one generation to the next
[1:10:06] to the next but what was beautiful about
[1:10:11] what he said about that image is that
[1:10:12] underneath all that trauma are all the
[1:10:15] answers we need to heal climate change
[1:10:17] to heal an unjust economic system a
[1:10:21] dysfunctional medical system you know a
[1:10:24] very oppressive globalized society where
[1:10:29] very few you know 1% of the population
[1:10:35] owns 90% 95% of the wealth of their
[1:10:39] resources so those solutions are already
[1:10:45] there just we don't need to discover
[1:10:47] them we don't need to go find them
[1:10:49] they're there in each of us that's our
[1:10:51] enlightenment that's that Lotus that can
[1:10:52] bloom from the mud of our suffering we
[1:10:54] have a collective Lotus that can bloom
[1:10:56] from the mud of our collective suffering
[1:11:00] and so I wanted to tell a story about
[1:11:03] how I saw this in action as I was a nun
[1:11:07] on a trip to Vietnam was to take not
[1:11:10] Hanh my teacher and our group of
[1:11:13] hundreds of monastics and also lay
[1:11:15] practitioners
[1:11:17] the purpose of that trip this was in
[1:11:19] 2007 was to do three ceremonies they
[1:11:22] were called mass Requiem ceremonies for
[1:11:27] healing in Vietnam both in the in the
[1:11:29] north in the center and in the south so
[1:11:33] these were three day-long ceremonies
[1:11:35] 10,000 people came to each one in all
[1:11:38] these different places it was the first
[1:11:40] time in the history of Vietnam that the
[1:11:42] suffering of the war was being
[1:11:43] acknowledged publicly so people were
[1:11:46] invited to share the names of their
[1:11:48] loved ones that had been killed in the
[1:11:49] war and where they had died and how they
[1:11:52] died and this was for we were praying
[1:11:56] for all people of all whatever
[1:11:58] background north south whether they were
[1:12:01] with the pro-communist or pro-american
[1:12:04] or not none so anyone could bring the
[1:12:08] name of their loved one how they died
[1:12:11] and so we had long lists of names that
[1:12:14] were stapled to altars there were altars
[1:12:17] all through these temples we had these
[1:12:18] big temple complexes that agreed to host
[1:12:20] these ceremonies so there's thousands
[1:12:22] and thousands of names on pieces of
[1:12:24] paper and then offerings on the altar
[1:12:26] and then we had a chant master from
[1:12:29] Vietnam who was skilled in tantric
[1:12:31] chanting and mudras was guiding us and
[1:12:34] taya was sitting there next to him and
[1:12:36] then the monastics we were chanting all
[1:12:38] night long all night long we didn't get
[1:12:41] up for hours and hours we didn't eat we
[1:12:43] didn't go to the bathroom we just sat
[1:12:44] there chanting all night long this went
[1:12:45] on for three days
[1:12:47] offering ceremonies and it was like the
[1:12:52] first time in this country's history
[1:12:54] since the war that the collective
[1:12:57] consciousness got to be massaged that
[1:13:00] there was a circulation that got to be
[1:13:02] allowed this block of suffering of all
[1:13:04] these people who lost loved ones
[1:13:07] sometimes their whole families were
[1:13:08] wiped out and they didn't even know
[1:13:09] sometimes where they were killed how
[1:13:11] they died they just they disappeared
[1:13:13] they could grieve for them this block of
[1:13:16] suffering was allowed up into the mind
[1:13:18] consciousness of a nation and was
[1:13:21] massaged was held was lovingly you know
[1:13:24] the grief was allowed to be there
[1:13:26] everyone was asked to be vegetarian
[1:13:28] during those three days I've Ono's asked
[1:13:30] to keep the precepts in their family
[1:13:32] homes during these three days they were
[1:13:34] asked not to yell at their family
[1:13:35] members not to fight each other to keep
[1:13:38] an environment of like a retreat at home
[1:13:41] to meditate to pray to call all these
[1:13:44] all these who died violently and
[1:13:47] painfully tragically to come and be
[1:13:51] healed by this chanting and I'll just
[1:13:54] tell you a few stories though some of
[1:13:55] the things that happened and I I don't
[1:13:58] claim you know you don't need to believe
[1:14:02] them but they move me so I'm just
[1:14:05] sharing them with you and you can do
[1:14:06] what you want with them but in a way I
[1:14:09] believe one of the ceremonies we did in
[1:14:12] the middle of the country people went to
[1:14:14] this river where many people had been
[1:14:16] massacred and they put this big cloth in
[1:14:18] the river to invite the souls of those
[1:14:20] who had died there to come on to the
[1:14:22] cloth so they could bring it and bring
[1:14:24] that as part of the ceremony well this
[1:14:28] is just a piece of cloth and after they
[1:14:30] did the chanting and ceremony inviting
[1:14:32] these souls to be there like nobody
[1:14:34] could pull the cloth it was so heavy
[1:14:36] they couldn't pull it out it took like
[1:14:38] 10 20 men with lots of effort to finally
[1:14:42] get the cloth out of the river and then
[1:14:46] another thing that happened was there
[1:14:49] was a this was in Ho Chi Minh City
[1:14:52] I believe it at the temple where we were
[1:14:54] chanting they had a a pole that was
[1:14:57] straight up a metal pole with a flag
[1:15:00] that was that's sort of the peak of this
[1:15:03] the highest point of this Center and
[1:15:06] during the ceremony during the chanting
[1:15:08] it just bent over this is straight solid
[1:15:11] piece of metal just got weighed down by
[1:15:13] something bent over so these were some
[1:15:17] of the things that I heard another thing
[1:15:20] I noticed for myself was every day every
[1:15:22] every every ceremony each time we did it
[1:15:25] on the third day it rained every time as
[1:15:28] we ended the ceremony it rained so for
[1:15:38] me that
[1:15:38] example and I had a very profound
[1:15:40] personal experience as we chanted just
[1:15:43] looking at my own suffering feeling I
[1:15:45] was also inviting my own ancestors and
[1:15:48] my blood family to come and there was
[1:15:49] healing happening for them that I'd
[1:15:51] never experienced before but it's
[1:15:54] something that I thought about after
[1:15:56] that those very like life-changing
[1:15:59] ceremonies that this is something we can
[1:16:02] do we can repeat we can do it in the
[1:16:03] United States we can many people are
[1:16:06] doing things like this like in in places
[1:16:12] of the Holocaust concentration camps
[1:16:14] doing ceremonies of healing of
[1:16:17] forgiveness you know there are people
[1:16:18] that have done a walk through the United
[1:16:20] States alone you know places where the
[1:16:23] middle passage where boats came and sold
[1:16:25] people from Africa they walked through
[1:16:29] the United States but I think these
[1:16:32] kinds of ceremonies we need to do more
[1:16:34] of and figure out also around healing or
[1:16:37] the damage we're doing to the earth
[1:16:40] coming together to grieve to honor the
[1:16:43] earth to allow this block of suffering
[1:16:48] and our collective to have circulation
[1:16:51] and begin to heal so that you know all
[1:16:54] these solutions that are just under the
[1:16:55] surface of our collective trauma can
[1:16:58] arise and keep us from self-destructing
[1:17:03] so thank you for that question
[1:17:05] Laurie there's another one from ginger
[1:17:08] cloud hello thank you so much for
[1:17:10] sharing these teachings you offer so
[1:17:12] much compassion and sweetness in your
[1:17:14] presentation I'm curious to hear about
[1:17:16] your Vipassana sit and how that
[1:17:18] experience mirrors or is different from
[1:17:20] ties teaching of the Dharma thank you
[1:17:22] for that question
[1:17:23] ginger so I am a Dharma teacher and
[1:17:28] taking out Hans lineage and I'm also
[1:17:30] becoming a teacher in the VIP pass on a
[1:17:32] tradition and I found silent retreats in
[1:17:35] the Vipassana tradition to be very
[1:17:37] beneficial and complimentary to my plum
[1:17:40] village practice I think there's a big
[1:17:45] emphasis on community in tick not Hans
[1:17:49] lineage and on personal practice
[1:17:52] yes but as it relates to how you connect
[1:17:56] with others especially in the monastic
[1:17:57] community it's so much about Sangha and
[1:18:00] the vapp asana practice in many places
[1:18:04] that I've encountered in the u.s. is not
[1:18:06] so much about community as about like
[1:18:09] really mastering techniques of
[1:18:11] meditation
[1:18:11] of course Sangha is the jewel in all
[1:18:13] Buddhist communities so that's the jewel
[1:18:15] that's very precious and it forms and
[1:18:17] these retreat centers but then you know
[1:18:20] you're in silence the whole time when a
[1:18:23] Vipassana retreat so what I found was
[1:18:25] beneficial for me there was really
[1:18:27] getting different kinds of meditation
[1:18:31] instruction than I had gotten in the
[1:18:34] plum village tradition that in certain
[1:18:35] ways were more specific like I learned a
[1:18:37] lot more about the brahma vihara and the
[1:18:40] indian picasso tradition because there
[1:18:43] were specific ones for each of the four
[1:18:46] brahma vihara that i had only learned
[1:18:47] them as one like Metta meditation and
[1:18:50] then of course we were encouraged to
[1:18:52] practice compassion practice joy and
[1:18:54] practice equanimity but I hadn't learned
[1:18:55] like specific meditations to cultivate
[1:18:58] those on their own and many different
[1:19:02] kinds of plums and in the Tibetan
[1:19:04] tradition there's also very specific
[1:19:06] ones that cultivate joy that cultivate
[1:19:08] equanimity so I think yeah that's been a
[1:19:13] lovely complement to the you know a lot
[1:19:20] of in in the plum village tradition a
[1:19:21] lot of training and loving speech deep
[1:19:23] listening that doesn't happen that much
[1:19:24] in Vipassana because you're in silence
[1:19:26] but then this deepening and getting to
[1:19:28] know your own mind through just the
[1:19:30] meditation practices in the silence but
[1:19:34] I see they very much complement each
[1:19:36] other and and I'm very happy to be part
[1:19:41] of both traditions and and both of them
[1:19:43] are changing and there's more silent
[1:19:45] retreats happening in the technolon
[1:19:47] tradition and there's you know more
[1:19:49] people in Vipassana talking about we
[1:19:51] need to develop more of the teachings
[1:19:53] around community and Sangha so thank you
[1:19:58] for the question ginger is this from
[1:20:01] Kobi Waveland
[1:20:04] noticed people in my life often not
[1:20:06] admitting they are suffering stressed or
[1:20:08] in pain and they're very defensive to
[1:20:10] the idea they have the power to
[1:20:12] transform and heal themselves and their
[1:20:14] environment as it is perceived by them
[1:20:16] as being blamed how do you how do you
[1:20:20] recommend to approach them with
[1:20:22] compassion and help so Thank You Koby I
[1:20:27] think that's you know we live in a
[1:20:30] society that's more and more globally
[1:20:32] that's more and more not it's not okay
[1:20:35] to be vulnerable if you think about the
[1:20:39] populations that are most vulnerable
[1:20:41] children refugees people of color poor
[1:20:45] people women in many countries and many
[1:20:50] places life is becoming more hostile I
[1:20:54] mean society is becoming more hostile to
[1:20:56] these people that are more vulnerable
[1:20:58] there's less and less of a social net
[1:21:01] there's less and less tolerance you know
[1:21:06] for Refugees for people who are
[1:21:09] different at least in the mainstream and
[1:21:14] I think that's a collective response
[1:21:16] fear to knowing that we're at a turning
[1:21:20] point right now we're coming to a
[1:21:22] precipice where we have to change or or
[1:21:28] cease to exist
[1:21:30] we have to figure out how to how to let
[1:21:35] this mud become a lotus so because of
[1:21:40] that hatred of the vulnerable that I
[1:21:45] think many people in power hate the
[1:21:47] vulnerability in themselves and so it's
[1:21:49] projected out as hatred as fear of those
[1:21:52] who are vulnerable in society so I think
[1:21:55] that's quite a tendency and I don't know
[1:21:57] Coby if some of these people you
[1:21:59] experienced this happening with tend to
[1:22:01] be more male or masculine masculine
[1:22:04] identified but I think that's also
[1:22:06] something that's very hard for those who
[1:22:08] are male identified to allow
[1:22:11] vulnerability and it's not something
[1:22:13] society has allowed men to experience or
[1:22:16] even women
[1:22:17] are in more positions of power they're
[1:22:20] not allowed they don't allow themselves
[1:22:22] to be vulnerable so to to to help them I
[1:22:30] think we need to understand that this is
[1:22:35] something that's they are caught in that
[1:22:37] they may not have chosen so we don't to
[1:22:39] judge them that there's also suffering a
[1:22:41] lot when they can't own up to and they
[1:22:43] can't feel into their own suffering I
[1:22:46] think one of the best things we can do
[1:22:48] is be practicing to embrace our own
[1:22:52] suffering and sometimes just being being
[1:22:56] around us that can have an effect but
[1:23:00] maybe just you know very gently I mean
[1:23:06] it's so important not to impose anything
[1:23:09] on anyone and not to tell someone we
[1:23:12] know what's happening with them you know
[1:23:14] because it needs to kind of they need to
[1:23:18] feel that they have space to discover
[1:23:21] and also that they really want them to
[1:23:25] not feel judged but to maybe just begin
[1:23:28] to be the mindfulness to their suffering
[1:23:32] so if it's someone you're close to just
[1:23:35] say you know I noticed that you're tense
[1:23:37] or I'm feeling like I see the lines in
[1:23:42] your forehead are you worried you know
[1:23:45] when someone goes like that and they're
[1:23:46] worried well just know being the
[1:23:48] mindfulness of reflecting back to them
[1:23:50] the ways that we see their suffering
[1:23:52] without judgment can maybe begin to help
[1:23:56] them notice that they're also suffering
[1:23:58] so sometimes you know how we might be
[1:24:04] holding something and we're not even
[1:24:06] aware of it and someone else says it to
[1:24:09] us and then we realize oh yeah I'm like
[1:24:11] all tense or I'm all worried or someone
[1:24:13] just comes and puts a hand on our
[1:24:15] shoulder and we oh we start to relax we
[1:24:17] didn't realize we were tense but they
[1:24:19] put their hand on our shoulder and they
[1:24:20] help just to see it so just connecting
[1:24:23] with them helping them feel your your
[1:24:26] compassion your care your non judgement
[1:24:30] and maybe gently gently reflecting back
[1:24:33] to them that you see their suffering
[1:24:36] that you see that they're in pain and
[1:24:38] that that's okay and letting them know
[1:24:40] you're a safe person to be with if they
[1:24:42] want to explore it if they want to learn
[1:24:45] to be with it so thank you for that
[1:24:48] question
[1:24:49] Cobie Alice we got a lot of questions
[1:24:54] coming in now so I'm happy to go over
[1:24:57] time if that's all right Cara and those
[1:25:00] of you who wish you can stay on with me
[1:25:02] I'll just keep answering as many as we
[1:25:05] can so Alice writes I initially tried to
[1:25:09] use a situation causing me stress and
[1:25:11] anxiety at the moment to work with
[1:25:13] however I found it difficult not to be
[1:25:15] sucked into the feelings of anxiety I
[1:25:17] then switched to another issue which is
[1:25:20] more about feeling hurt and sad this
[1:25:23] worked much better as I felt able to
[1:25:25] take care of that hurt is this
[1:25:27] meditation appropriate for anxiety or
[1:25:29] better for emotional distress
[1:25:31] thank you for your teaching Thank You
[1:25:34] Alice what a good question Mary so so
[1:25:37] appreciate how clearly and carefully you
[1:25:39] were tracking your own experience as you
[1:25:41] tried to practice this in the meditation
[1:25:46] I think this meditation of embracing our
[1:25:50] emotions can also work with anxiety but
[1:25:53] I think it might be that we need to
[1:25:55] stabilize our mindfulness so that it's
[1:25:57] stronger in order to deal with something
[1:26:00] more provocative or more triggering so
[1:26:04] or it could be that having someone with
[1:26:06] you or even tuning in with someone on
[1:26:09] the phone or on a zoom call who can
[1:26:11] meditate with you could also help so
[1:26:15] that it's not so overwhelming so either
[1:26:17] strengthening your own mindfulness or
[1:26:19] getting getting in calling in more more
[1:26:24] backup to help you hold it and then
[1:26:26] bringing it up and asking other people
[1:26:27] to help you hold it one of the things
[1:26:30] that I want to just share about this
[1:26:31] that I find a beautiful practice that
[1:26:34] you might consider doing with others
[1:26:35] it's called Vipassana out loud but it's
[1:26:39] basically like that process and Tara
[1:26:41] brach and other teachers and the
[1:26:44] my tradition I gave you take not Hans
[1:26:46] version of rain bringing up a difficult
[1:26:49] emotion and embracing it but in the past
[1:26:52] no tradition it exists as a practice
[1:26:53] called rain Rai n4 steps
[1:26:56] recognize are allow accept a investigate
[1:27:02] I and n nurture so nurturing yourself
[1:27:06] not identifying with the suffering but
[1:27:08] nurturing and taking care of yourself as
[1:27:12] you look into what that emotion is and
[1:27:15] you know what it needs from you
[1:27:20] wonderful resources all over the
[1:27:23] internet for free there's a new book
[1:27:24] thar just wrote about rain also but
[1:27:27] there's you can do this out loud and she
[1:27:29] shares how to do this in her book where
[1:27:32] you have a partner you don't have to
[1:27:36] don't know how to have a teacher no one
[1:27:37] has to know more than the other to do
[1:27:39] this together but you do the rain
[1:27:41] practice together and some of its in
[1:27:44] silence some of its where you're sharing
[1:27:47] outloud what you're experiencing so that
[1:27:49] could be a way also to get at this more
[1:27:51] triggering anxiety where someone else is
[1:27:54] with you and then you're not so
[1:27:56] overwhelmed by it because you're not
[1:27:57] alone with it so you might look into
[1:27:59] that book look into those resources if
[1:28:01] someone can look online and just see
[1:28:03] what the title of that book is and put
[1:28:05] it in the chat that'd be great so people
[1:28:08] can find it okay so we can go over just
[1:28:13] a few minutes okay thanks Cara so I'll
[1:28:15] just try to answer another question one
[1:28:22] other question okay Annie are Amelia
[1:28:30] here's Amelia's question what can you
[1:28:33] say about childhood abuse physical and
[1:28:35] verbal and the things you said I have
[1:28:38] experienced this and feel how big the
[1:28:40] fear is it can feel so deep and changing
[1:28:43] the narratives criticism through being
[1:28:46] aware of them and choosing other ways
[1:28:49] hasn't been easy nor the journey of
[1:28:51] understanding and being compassionate
[1:28:53] with that I mean trying to observe fear
[1:28:56] hasn't been enough
[1:28:57] but that there are other things involved
[1:29:00] that can take very long to be aware of
[1:29:04] and then she adds Emilia adds I mean
[1:29:08] it's not just about letting go of the
[1:29:10] expectation of not ever having fear
[1:29:13] again it can be helpful in certain ways
[1:29:15] as each emotion is but how difficult it
[1:29:18] is to live with so much fear that's all
[1:29:21] thank you very much so there's a couple
[1:29:24] other questions about fear as well so I
[1:29:29] hope what I'll say will be relevant to
[1:29:32] some of the others as well so thank you
[1:29:36] for this question thank you for your
[1:29:37] vulnerability for asking and and I just
[1:29:47] appreciate your courage for bringing
[1:29:49] this because it's it can be such a deep
[1:29:52] experience like paralyzing fear and when
[1:29:56] we've had these experiences in our
[1:29:58] childhood so you talked about how the
[1:30:06] journey of understanding and being
[1:30:09] compassionate with that is not very easy
[1:30:11] and that it's not enough to observe the
[1:30:14] fear so it is a journey and there are
[1:30:20] many many you know many angles of you
[1:30:26] know where the healing comes and I think
[1:30:33] you know really that step of recognizing
[1:30:43] that this is there and getting our
[1:30:52] resourced to to really be with it to
[1:31:01] really hold it and care for it and and I
[1:31:04] didn't I hope I didn't explain it in a
[1:31:07] way that made it seem like it was easy
[1:31:09] or quick or you know this big block of
[1:31:11] suffering would be over you know in a
[1:31:14] short time it's it could be a lifetime
[1:31:16] process but this sense of honoring it
[1:31:25] like really honoring that this is this
[1:31:28] is part of our story and it needs our
[1:31:30] care and our attention and you know it
[1:31:37] is it is a big it can be a very big part
[1:31:40] of our identity it can be something that
[1:31:43] really shapes us in a huge way for a
[1:31:46] long time and it also doesn't need to
[1:31:54] confine us you know that part of the
[1:31:56] meditation about space about freedom
[1:31:59] even in the midst of like the deepest
[1:32:02] fear the most paralyzing and
[1:32:04] overwhelming fear that seed of space and
[1:32:07] freedom is still there in our the depths
[1:32:10] of our mind so just like when the sky is
[1:32:14] very dark and rainy and cloudy and
[1:32:17] stormy and there's lightning and thunder
[1:32:19] the Sun is still shining if we would go
[1:32:24] above the clouds we would notice the Sun
[1:32:26] was still shining so we might live for
[1:32:30] many years in a storm where there's
[1:32:33] constant fear and that's maybe all we've
[1:32:36] known but it doesn't mean that the Sun
[1:32:38] ever stopped shining and then it's not
[1:32:40] shining now it's always shining
[1:32:42] so it's possible when we you know get
[1:32:48] resources when we learn more mindfulness
[1:32:52] in our daily life I mean we can practice
[1:32:54] mindfulness in every moment of our life
[1:32:56] as we brush our teeth we can know we're
[1:32:58] brushing our teeth as we sit on the
[1:33:00] toilet we can know we're sitting on the
[1:33:02] toilet anytime we bring our
[1:33:05] attention into the present moment we're
[1:33:07] not feeding the seed of seer anytime we
[1:33:11] bring our attention into our body to
[1:33:14] notice what's here and now we're taking
[1:33:18] energy away from that part of ourself
[1:33:20] that lives in the past and that is
[1:33:22] caught in that fear of what happened to
[1:33:24] us in our childhood that daily moment by
[1:33:30] moment every time we take a step and
[1:33:32] just realizing I'm stepping right now
[1:33:33] this is my right so this is my left foot
[1:33:36] we're nourishing sanity we're nourishing
[1:33:38] stability we're nourishing in us the
[1:33:40] ability to not be carried away when the
[1:33:43] fear arises so that daily practice not
[1:33:47] just in our sitting meditation but in
[1:33:48] our mindful eating our mindful drinking
[1:33:51] mindful working when we vacuum and we
[1:33:53] sleep knowing following the motions of
[1:33:55] our body you know there's a beautiful
[1:33:57] book with mindful verses to help us be
[1:34:00] mindful in all different times of our of
[1:34:03] our day it's called present moment
[1:34:05] wonderful moment I really recommend this
[1:34:07] practice of mindful God does to
[1:34:10] mindfulness verses to help us be mindful
[1:34:11] and we wash the dishes to help us be
[1:34:13] mindful as we eat to help us be mindful
[1:34:15] army open the window when we wake up in
[1:34:17] the morning when we go to bed all these
[1:34:19] moments we can infuse with presence and
[1:34:21] that diminishes our fear that diminishes
[1:34:24] the trauma of our childhood because
[1:34:26] we're not living in that past story
[1:34:29] right so this is more than I mean I'm
[1:34:34] this would you know your your question
[1:34:37] deserves much more time and attention
[1:34:39] and we're we don't have it but I would
[1:34:42] encourage you to read books about
[1:34:44] healing trauma if you haven't that also
[1:34:48] there's mindfulness based trauma
[1:34:51] resources that the body keeps the score
[1:34:54] is a beautiful book about trauma many
[1:34:57] more that also help us to become
[1:35:03] embodied live in the present and slowly
[1:35:06] as we get more resourced we can massage
[1:35:08] that block of suffering so it's no
[1:35:10] longer in presenting us and it is a
[1:35:12] process and we need to be very gentle
[1:35:14] and very respectful the speed we need to
[1:35:18] go to heal it it's not something anyone
[1:35:21] else can dictate we need to learn for
[1:35:23] ourselves what's the speed that's going
[1:35:25] to work for us to slowly begin to heal
[1:35:30] so I'm so grateful for everyone for your
[1:35:33] questions I'm sorry we couldn't get to
[1:35:35] all of them I have a website I'll leave
[1:35:40] you the link right here
[1:35:41] Kyra Jewell calm I also have a
[1:35:45] newsletter that I send out every so
[1:35:48] often with teachings that I give
[1:35:52] sometimes guided meditation sometimes a
[1:35:54] written transcript of a Q&A so sign up
[1:35:59] for the newsletter on Kyra Jewell calm
[1:36:01] stay in touch with me you can send me
[1:36:04] some of these questions that we didn't
[1:36:05] get to I have a contact page on my
[1:36:08] website I'm happy to write to you some
[1:36:11] thoughts after this thank you all so
[1:36:13] much for your practice for your presence
[1:36:18] for our time together today and may may
[1:36:22] we offer up the merit together may the
[1:36:26] merit the good energy of our meditation
[1:36:29] of our receiving and practicing the
[1:36:34] Dharma of our question-and-answer time
[1:36:36] of our deep looking of our sincere
[1:36:39] practice may may all of that benefit all
[1:36:44] beings everywhere so that we all can
[1:36:47] leave the forest of confusion and fear
[1:36:50] and hatred and violence and destroying
[1:36:53] our planet and heal the collective
[1:36:56] trauma that we are all a part of so that
[1:37:00] the the joy the health the living in
[1:37:05] harmony with the earth the treating each
[1:37:07] other as family can become a reality for
[1:37:12] our generation for all future
[1:37:14] generations so may we all live safely
[1:37:20] and beautifully in this next year in
[1:37:23] this next new decade thank you all