Transcript
[0:00] (funky music)
[0:09] - So, claiming power, what is power?
[0:15] That word can have a
positive or a negative
[0:18] connotation to it.
[0:19] What do you think it is?
[0:20] How would you define power?
[0:22] First thing that comes to mind.
[0:25] - [Audience Member] Strength.
[0:25] - Strength, what else?
[0:27] - [Audience Member] Energy.
[0:28] - Energy, what else?
[0:30] - [Audience Member] Influence.
[0:31] - Ignorance?
[0:32] Oh, influence, yes.
[0:33] Ignorance.
(laughs)
[0:36] - [Audience Member] Love.
[0:37] - Confidence, love.
[0:38] Are there any negative
connotations to power?
[0:41] What could those be?
[0:44] Manipulation, control, what else?
[0:46] - [Audience Member] Abuse.
[0:47] - Abuse, what else?
[0:49] - [Audience Member] Arrogance.
[0:50] - Arrogance, this is a great opportunity
[0:53] to define terms, right?
[0:55] 'Cause if I'm sittin'
here, claim your power,
[0:57] and you're like, yeah, I'm
gonna be more arrogant.
[0:58] It's like no, no, no, no, no.
[1:00] (laughs)
No, no, no.
[1:01] Okay, very simply put,
power is your ability
[1:03] to make your purpose real.
[1:06] Thought, action, reaction, reality.
[1:10] Can I take an idea, an
inspiration, a calling,
[1:15] a nudging, something that I wanna create,
[1:18] and can I make it real?
[1:19] And not just for five seconds,
can I sustain it, right?
[1:23] That's the name of the game.
[1:25] So then the question
becomes what determines
[1:27] how much power you have?
[1:29] What determines it?
[1:31] What gives you power?
[1:36] What do you guys think?
[1:37] - [Audience Member] Money.
[1:38] - Money, hmm, interesting, what else?
[1:40] - [Audience Member] Mindset.
[1:41] - Mindset, interesting, what else?
[1:43] Money and mindset, interesting, okay.
[1:46] Sounds like a webinar,
Money Mindset Webinar.
[1:48] (laughs)
[1:50] Me and you?
[1:52] Being you gives you power, yeah.
[1:54] Yes?
[1:56] Yeah what?
[1:58] Believing in yourself,
okay, great, awesome.
[2:00] You ever feel like the genie from Aladdin?
[2:04] Infinite cosmic power!
[2:07] Itty bitty living space.
[2:08] You ever feel that way?
[2:10] - [Audience Member] Yeah.
[2:11] - You know what I'm talkin' about?
[2:11] Right?
[2:12] You're just like, you
have this big thing in you
[2:13] that how do I get it out of there?
[2:14] How do I make it free?
[2:16] Right?
[2:16] Takes three things, only three.
[2:19] Okay, first one is emotional awareness.
[2:23] Now what does awareness mean?
[2:29] What's awareness?
[2:30] That's a word that
spiritual folk throw around.
[2:32] Awareness.
[2:34] What is awareness?
[2:35] Paying attention?
[2:36] Here's what awareness
means, you notice it.
[2:39] It's noticed, 'cause
guess what most of us do?
[2:42] When we have something
uncomfortable in our body,
[2:44] could be like little tweak physically,
[2:47] or an emotion that's not comfortable,
[2:48] what do we do?
[2:50] Tend to.
[2:52] We tend to push it down,
we tend to ignore it,
[2:54] we go for the sugar, we go for all
[2:56] that type of stuff, right?
[2:57] Like yesterday, the TV
was on for one second
[2:59] during something and this show opens
[3:02] and this woman is literally
squirting whipped cream
[3:04] into her mouth, eating
a donut and ice cream,
[3:06] and I was so jealous.
[3:07] I was like, oh my god,
this is amazing, right?
[3:10] (laughs)
[3:11] So good, right?
[3:13] But we tend to do stuff like that, right?
[3:15] We numb, we fight, we
argue, we run, we eat,
[3:18] we go and overwork, we do
all these types of things.
[3:23] But emotional awareness just says,
[3:26] what am I noticing, or what
am I paying attention to
[3:28] in the sensations in my body?
[3:30] It does not mean that you
overanalyze or spiritualize them.
[3:34] One of the things we do as human beings
[3:36] is we over, how should I put this?
[3:41] We are superstitious about
our emotional states.
[3:45] I'm feeling very anxious,
Mercury must be in Retrograde.
[3:51] (audience laughs)
[3:54] I'm feeling upset, that's
a very Taurus thing to do.
[4:00] It means that this is not meant to be.
[4:03] And we start to go to all these places.
[4:05] Who here's ever done this
by the way before, right?
[4:06] What we tend to do is we
tend to have sensations
[4:09] in the body, and then our
brain makes up stories
[4:12] about what they mean,
and then we go, yeah,
[4:14] and then other people are doin' that shit,
[4:15] and we co-agree.
[4:17] Yeah, Mercury's in fuckin' retrograde,
[4:18] do not sign a contract.
[4:20] (audience laughs)
[4:22] I'm serious Mastin, do not sign contracts
[4:24] when Mercury's in retrograde,
that's serious business!
[4:27] Maybe, right?
[4:28] Trust me, technology breaks
whether Mercury is in,
[4:31] or out of retrograde.
[4:33] Okay, it breaks, all the time.
[4:36] I've signed contracts when
Mercury's not in retrograde
[4:38] and they still didn't go well.
[4:40] I've signed contracts when
Mercury is in retrograde,
[4:42] it was fine, right?
[4:44] That might be a belief system,
and if that's what your
[4:46] belief system is, I honor that,
[4:49] but what we have to look at guys is am I
[4:51] overanalyzing emotional states?
[4:54] What if it was just a sensation?
[4:57] What if it was just information?
[4:59] What would that mean?
[5:08] If it's just info, what do
you do with information?
[5:12] You're like, what is, I mean look at it,
[5:15] but we're not trained to do that,
[5:16] we're trained to disassociate,
[5:17] we'll get more into
that in a second, okay?
[5:19] After you have emotional awareness,
[5:21] you have to have intelligence.
[5:22] So awareness is, this is
how I'm feeling right now,
[5:26] intelligence is, this is how I design
[5:29] the emotions I wanna feel.
[5:32] Intelligence, there's a whole thing on
[5:33] emotional intelligence,
it's important stuff,
[5:35] but it's not enough, but
it's definitely important,
[5:37] because can you architect feeling good?
[5:40] Can you design it?
[5:42] How do you do it?
[5:44] Simple, open a bottle of
wine, pour it in a glass,
[5:46] drink that shit, you feel great!
[5:49] (laughs)
[5:50] Of course you can design
emotional states, right?
[5:53] But can you design it without substances?
[5:56] Of course, it's just harder,
and also better, right?
[6:00] All day long.
[6:01] So the real name of the
game is emotional fitness,
[6:05] and that's the part that
most people don't wanna hear.
[6:07] They want the magic bullet,
six steps to perfectional
[6:09] thingamajiggers success,
where it just stays and lasts.
[6:13] I don't have to touch
it, set it and forget it,
[6:14] and everything's fine, right?
[6:16] But emotional fitness
is the name of the game.
[6:18] What does fitness imply guys?
[6:21] It's something that you have
to consistently rehearse.
[6:24] What happens if you don't
rehearse it consistently?
[6:29] All day long, because here's the thing,
[6:31] and here's what's true, our human bodies
[6:34] are designed to be on
automatic and manual.
[6:39] Automatic and manual.
[6:40] Do we have automatic responses?
[6:42] What do you think, yes or no?
[6:44] You know you do!
[6:44] Here's how you know,
that one person gives you
[6:47] that specific look, you know what I'm
[6:50] talkin' about, the look?
[6:51] Who here as someone in their life
[6:53] that if they give you a certain look,
[6:55] you have an automatic
response to that look?
[6:56] Let me see by a show of hands.
[6:58] Right?
[6:59] Or a tone.
[7:03] You know the tone, how you doin'?
[7:05] Fine.
[7:07] (audience laughs)
[7:08] Does your body have an automatic response
[7:10] to shit like that, yes or no?
[7:12] - [Audience Member] Yes.
[7:13] - It does, and so, is there a purpose
[7:14] to have automatic responses?
[7:17] Is there a purpose for
that, what do you think?
[7:19] Like why would we have
automatic responses in our body?
[7:22] Like why would the process
of evolution get us there?
[7:26] - [Audience Member] Survival.
[7:26] - That's right, because
there's that's happening
[7:28] around us that you
don't have time to think
[7:30] about responding to,
and things are happening
[7:32] so fast, and guess what?
[7:34] The majority of the threat assessment
[7:36] that your body is making
is from the neck down.
[7:39] And here's what's happening,
I'll get into this later,
[7:41] we're gonna start getting
into it right now,
[7:43] the organs of your body
are literally sending you
[7:47] information through your vagus nerve,
[7:49] up into your brain, and
you call it anxiety.
[7:54] Maybe, or maybe it's good info.
[7:58] That's what intuition
is, you feel something,
[8:01] and then you're like, I feel something.
[8:05] Oh fuck that, push that down, and do what
[8:08] that person told me to do, right?
[8:11] Or I can't do that because that will make
[8:13] that person mad.
[8:15] And we're constantly getting information
[8:16] from our bodies and we're
pushing it down consistently,
[8:19] and here's the thing,
our bodies have evolved
[8:23] to have very, very, very
finely tuned threat detection.
[8:27] The prefrontal cortex of
the brain is one of the
[8:29] best threat detectors in existence,
[8:33] because guess what we can
tell the difference of?
[8:35] Facial expressions.
[8:38] Does different facial expressions
mean different things?
[8:41] What do you guys think, yes or no?
[8:42] - [Audience] Yes.
[8:43] - What does this mean?
[8:46] Nothing, okay.
[8:47] (audience laughs)
[8:48] I'll go over here instead.
[8:50] (audience laughs)
[8:52] What does something like this mean?
[8:55] Safe or threatening?
[8:57] - [Audience] Safe.
[8:58] - What about this?
[8:59] - [Audience] Scared.
[9:00] - Safe or threatening?
[9:02] What about?
[9:04] - [Audience] Threatening.
[9:05] - Have I said anything?
[9:06] - [Audience] No.
[9:07] - It's just the face, right?
[9:09] We can tell, reptiles do
not have that ability.
[9:13] They're not like, oh
Fred's face over there,
[9:15] the lizard, what's up with his face?
[9:18] They just have automatic responses.
[9:20] We have evolved, and here's the thing,
[9:21] all of that analysis is
happening in the prefrontal
[9:24] cortex up here, looking,
scanning for threat.
[9:28] Our body is also taking in information,
[9:30] sending it up to the brain,
and the prefrontal cortex
[9:32] is saying, that's threatening.
[9:35] Now, based on what?
[9:38] Based on what happened
perhaps, based on the genes
[9:41] that you inherited from your parents
[9:44] and the lineage before you,
based on the expectations
[9:47] of your peer group, and based on the pain
[9:49] that you went through.
[9:50] And here's the problem,
we overestimate threat,
[9:54] because the success and opportunity
[9:56] come dressed like a threat.
[10:03] Here's how, this is how we want it to be,
[10:05] alright, here's the perfect blueprint,
[10:07] not gonna make any mistakes,
here's the guaranteed cash,
[10:10] here's everybody's
approval, now you're good,
[10:12] and you don't have to make
any significant changes.
[10:14] Alright, that's how change happens.
[10:17] Is that how it happens?
[10:18] You're like, please let it
be that way Mastin, please.
[10:21] Everything that we want
is perceived as danger
[10:27] if we don't interrupt
the automatic response,
[10:29] because our body's
tryin' to keep us alive.
[10:31] Is that a good thing?
[10:33] Is you being alive a good thing?
[10:35] - [Audience] Yes.
[10:36] - Okay, good.
[10:37] I hope you think that's a good thing.
[10:38] (laughs)
[10:39] Alright, so we have to
realize that there's
[10:41] automatic mode, which is survival based,
[10:43] and then there's intentional mode,
[10:45] there's manual mode where
you're like, no, no, no,
[10:46] I'm not gonna do that anymore.
[10:48] I'm having a response,
and I'm aware of the fact
[10:51] that I'm gonna choose differently.
[10:52] Because just because your body
has an automatic response,
[10:55] does that make it so?
[10:56] Does that make it how it has to be guys,
[10:57] what do you think?
[10:58] Does it have to be that way?
[11:00] What if it's not, I'm feeling
something so you're an ...
[11:04] Versus, I'm scared at the moment.
[11:10] Did you realize that depending
on how you view life,
[11:13] it sends different signals
to the nervous system?
[11:16] If you view life through comparison,
[11:18] it sends a nerve system
signal, it says threat.
[11:20] And all the body's responses
interpret the information
[11:23] coming into you as threatening.
[11:25] If you go out into the world and have
[11:27] the lens of curiosity,
is curiosity threatening?
[11:31] Oh what is that?
[11:34] Hmm, why are you scared?
[11:36] Is that threatening?
[11:37] What about, don't be scared!
[11:40] Is that threatening?
[11:41] Of course, right?
[11:43] We're consistently making
threat assessments,
[11:45] and you've got to learn how to be curious
[11:47] instead of comparison.
[11:49] It's a different literal
nervous system response.
[11:51] I'll get into that here in a second,
[11:53] but this is what emotional fitness is,
[11:55] emotional fitness says my
body has automatic responses
[11:58] that I will choose to
listen to, acknowledge,
[12:01] and then begin to heal.
[12:04] Begin to heal, because it
doesn't have to be this way,
[12:07] and the problem is long
term, I believe in medication
[12:11] from time-to-time, but
medication is not the solution,
[12:14] it's really a supplementation.
[12:16] For me, I have traumatic,
there's the dyslexia,
[12:20] traumatic brain injury,
that's pretty funny,
[12:22] traumatic brain injury.
(laughs)
[12:24] Talkin' about my brain,
right, I have traumatic
[12:27] brain injuries in my
brain, and I also have ADD.
[12:30] I take prescription medication for that,
[12:32] but I don't believe that
my prescription medication
[12:33] will do the work for me.
[12:36] The prescription
medication's not gonna say,
[12:38] you know what, take
responsibility for your life.
[12:40] Prescription medication's not gonna say,
[12:42] you know what, work
harder, add more value,
[12:44] take a risk, be courteous, be gracious.
[12:48] The prescription medication
just gives me help
[12:52] because my brain is damaged.
[12:53] Who follows?
[12:54] Does it make sense?
[12:55] Does that make sense you guys?
[12:56] So when we look at
prescription medication,
[12:57] it's not necessarily bad,
but it's not the long term
[13:00] solution to the problem,
because we have to realize
[13:03] that a lot of times what
we're doing is simply
[13:05] just taking a prescription
medication to numb out
[13:07] the body's automatic responses,
[13:09] which is a bad idea,
because it's sending you
[13:11] a signal for a reason.
[13:14] We have to learn to listen,
we can't numb the noise,
[13:16] we can't numb the signal.
[13:17] So emotional fitness
says, I am not just a set
[13:20] of automatic responses, I am intentional,
[13:23] and I can create my
life, and I'm not gonna
[13:25] make myself wrong for my responses,
[13:27] there's a good reason to do that,
[13:28] and we're gonna get into that right now.
[13:29] We're gonna talk about mastery.
[13:31] What is mastery guys?
[13:39] That's right, it's something
you can do in your sleep.
[13:41] You ever see, for me
I always love watching
[13:44] the Olympic gymnasts, and
they just do where they're
[13:47] flying around and they're so agile,
[13:49] and you're like, how?
[13:52] It's like art and technique.
[13:55] Athletes have this, you
have something that's just
[13:58] automatic and you're so good
at it that it's no problem.
[14:01] Who's seen people like this?
[14:02] We've all seen people like this, right?
[14:03] What is it like to witness that mastery?
[14:06] It's amazing!
[14:08] Time just flies by, right?
[14:10] There's three phases of mastery,
[14:11] phase one most of us are familiar with,
[14:13] it's the excitement phase.
[14:15] Oh my god, it's January first, yes!
[14:21] This is going to be easy,
goin' to the gym, I got this!
[14:24] I'm in!
[14:26] This is not scary!
[14:28] Fear, you, I eat you for
breakfast with my shake, right?
[14:32] (laughs)
[14:33] I don't need any help,
I got this by myself,
[14:36] and for real, I'm gonna
do it, no for real!
[14:39] For real.
[14:40] How long does that shit last?
[14:43] Who here feels like you just had a bunch
[14:45] of fuckin' excitement
phases and then just stops?
[14:48] Anyone be honest and just admit that?
[14:49] You're just, fuck I got so excited,
[14:52] but then it got hard, so
I shiny pennyed over here
[14:53] and got excited, didn't work
out, and then I went over here,
[14:56] got excited, and just kinda goin' around,
[14:57] gettin' half-assed
excited, and they're like,
[14:59] I've tried everything!
[15:00] Everything but sticking with it.
[15:02] (laughs)
[15:05] Right?
[15:06] So excitement's fun,
January first is about
[15:08] the time we all tend
to get into it, right?
[15:10] Then, the most important
phase is resistance.
[15:13] What the is this?
[15:15] (laughs)
[15:16] Right?
[15:17] This is harder than I
thought it was gonna be,
[15:19] it's scary, I'm gonna
withdraw and isolate.
[15:20] I'm gonna go chase another shiny penny
[15:24] instead of following through on this thing
[15:25] that I made a decision
with, and you know what,
[15:27] it's just like everything else,
[15:29] all the other times I've done it.
[15:31] All the other times.
[15:33] All the other times.
[15:34] I said I wasn't gonna do
it, and I did it again.
[15:36] Who's ever hit a resistance phase before,
[15:38] let me see by a show of hands, right?
[15:40] And what people tend to do is they tend
[15:41] to stop in resistance.
[15:44] But resistance is the name of the game.
[15:45] How well you work with resistance,
[15:47] that will determine how far you go.
[15:49] Think about this,
resistance weight training,
[15:52] you need resistance to
grow stronger, do you not?
[15:54] Of course, right?
[15:56] Yoga, your body will resist you.
[15:59] (laughs)
[16:00] Right?
[16:01] You don't wanna push it
too far, but just enough,
[16:03] the pose in yoga begins when
it gets slightly uncomfortable.
[16:07] The work in your life
and your purpose begins
[16:09] when the uncomfort sets in.
[16:11] You have to learn to anticipate it
[16:12] and set yourself up, and
you can't lie to yourself
[16:15] that you can do it by yourself.
[16:16] You cannot do it alone,
everybody needs help,
[16:20] and here's the thing, in this room,
[16:21] I already know you're probably really good
[16:25] at supporting others.
[16:26] Who here's really good
at supporting others?
[16:27] I love helping other people.
[16:28] Who here is like I can't
wait to ask for help?
[16:33] A couple people.
[16:34] They're like yeah, help
me, I need the help.
[16:36] Who here feels like asking for help
[16:38] is offensive, scary, and or something
[16:39] you don't wanna do?
[16:40] If you're really honest, let
me see by a show of hands.
[16:42] So, but that's the deal.
[16:44] We actually have to learn
how to work together,
[16:46] and learning how to ask for
help is the name of the game.
[16:48] I could not produce this event by myself.
[16:51] There's no fuckin' way.
[16:52] There's no way.
[16:54] I'm just the guy yappin' on stage.
[16:55] All this other stuff, I didn't do.
[16:57] And it takes, the term
is, it takes teamwork
[17:00] to make the dream work,
we've probably heard
[17:02] a version of that.
[17:03] You can't do it alone.
[17:04] You can't do it alone.
[17:05] You can't isolate and be successful,
[17:07] it does not work, alright?
[17:09] Now, what happens if you bust through
[17:11] this resistance phase, you stick with it,
[17:13] you have support, you have a tribe,
[17:15] you have mentors, you're
getting consistent feedback,
[17:17] you're comin' back, you're
getting in the hang of things,
[17:20] that's when you earn mastery.
[17:22] And your thoughts then, you forget,
[17:24] see here's the thing, when you
get to the end of something,
[17:26] you forget how hard it was sometimes.
[17:28] I've had clients that are like, yeah,
[17:30] when I was havin' a child
and I was giving birth,
[17:32] I thought to myself, never
gonna fuckin' do that again,
[17:35] and then like six months
later they're like,
[17:37] maybe we should have
another kid, you know.
[17:40] Or you go do something really hard,
[17:42] and then at the end of it, you're like,
[17:44] that was no big deal.
[17:45] But in the moment, did
it feel like a big deal?
[17:47] Come on guys, yes or no?
[17:48] - [Audience] Yes.
[17:49] - Of course it does.
[17:50] But at the end, you're
like, I can't believe
[17:51] I doubted myself.
[17:53] Challenge is how I grow.
[17:55] These are the conversations
you have with yourself, right?
[17:58] I'm not isolating, I'm showing up more,
[18:00] I'm asking for help, I can't do it alone,
[18:03] and this is a lifestyle.
[18:05] Habits can be created in 30, 60, 90 days,
[18:07] it takes a year or more
to create a lifestyle.
[18:10] What's the difference between
a habit and a lifestyle?
[18:18] A habit is one thing you do in your life,
[18:21] it could be getting up early at five a.m.,
[18:24] that's a habit.
[18:25] Changing your lifestyle, that quadrant
[18:27] that you filled out at the beginning,
[18:29] is when everything's at an eight or above,
[18:32] which is a little bit
different than a habit, right?
[18:35] And yes, little steps
are how you get there.
[18:37] How do you eat a field of kale?
[18:41] I say this because if I say steak or cows,
[18:43] people get offended if
they're vegans, right?
[18:46] Kale is just as offensive by the way,
[18:47] but it's fine.
[18:48] (laughs)
[18:50] How do you eat a field of kale?
[18:53] One bite at a time.
[18:56] So that's why if you want a habit change,
[18:58] dedicate yourself to something
for 30 days, 60 days.
[19:01] If you want lifestyle change,
[19:02] do this from now on.
[19:04] (funky music)