Glennon Doyle's poignant assertion, "Pain is part of being human. Suffering is what we do with it," invites us to explore the intricate relationship between the inevitable pain we encounter in life and the choices we make in response to that pain. This distinction is crucial; while pain is a universal experience, suffering is a subjective interpretation that can either bind us or liberate us. Understanding this difference can profoundly impact our emotional and spiritual well-being, guiding us toward a more conscious existence.
In a world that often glorifies happiness and success, Doyle's words remind us that pain is not a sign of weakness but rather an intrinsic aspect of the human condition. By acknowledging pain as a shared experience, we can cultivate empathy and connection with others. This perspective encourages us to confront our suffering with intention, allowing us to transform our pain into a source of growth and resilience rather than a burden that weighs us down.
The image / the metaphor
The imagery in Doyle's quote evokes a landscape of human experience marked by both pain and suffering. Pain, depicted as a natural part of life, is akin to the weather—unpredictable and often harsh. Suffering, on the other hand, is portrayed as a choice, a response that can either entrap us in despair or propel us toward healing. The verbs "is" and "do" highlight the distinction between the passive acceptance of pain and the active engagement with suffering, suggesting that while we cannot escape pain, we hold the power to shape our response.
In the speaker's tradition
Glennon Doyle's insights resonate deeply within the realm of modern spirituality, where the exploration of pain and suffering is often framed through concepts such as dharma and kenosis. Dharma, the idea of living in accordance with one's true purpose, encourages us to embrace our pain as part of our journey toward self-discovery. Kenosis, the act of self-emptying, invites us to release our attachments to suffering, allowing us to experience a more profound sense of freedom and connection with others.
In her book "Untamed," Doyle weaves these themes into a narrative that emphasizes authenticity and vulnerability. She draws parallels to the Buddhist concept of sunyata, or emptiness, which teaches that our suffering is often rooted in our attachments and desires. By recognizing the transient nature of pain and the choices we make in response to it, we can cultivate a sense of peace and acceptance, ultimately leading us toward a more liberated existence.
Living the teaching
Consider a modern scenario where this teaching resonates: a person grappling with the loss of a loved one. The pain of grief is undeniable, a visceral experience that can feel overwhelming. However, how one navigates that pain can lead to different outcomes. By choosing to honor the memory of the deceased through acts of love and remembrance, rather than succumbing to despair, the individual transforms their suffering into a tribute, fostering healing and connection with others who share in the loss.
In the context of relationships, this teaching can manifest during conflicts or misunderstandings. When faced with emotional pain caused by a partner's actions, one might choose to dwell in suffering, allowing resentment to fester. Alternatively, by engaging in open communication and seeking to understand the underlying issues, the couple can transform their pain into an opportunity for growth and deeper intimacy. This choice to confront suffering with compassion can strengthen their bond and foster a more resilient partnership.
A reflection
As we contemplate Doyle's profound words, we are invited to reflect on our own relationship with pain and suffering. What choices do we make in response to the inevitable challenges we face? In what ways can we transform our suffering into a source of strength and connection? By engaging with these questions, we can begin to navigate our experiences with greater awareness, ultimately embracing the fullness of our humanity.
