Elements of Desire: An Erotic Lab for Queer Men

What does it feel like to reclaim your desire as medicine rather than shame? This transformative weekend workshop at Esalen Institute invites queer men—cisgender and transmasculine—into a rare, carefully held space to explore sexuality and embodiment through direct experience, not theory. Led by sexuality counselor and somatic practitioner Finn Deerhart, Elements of Desire asks the questions that matter most: How has trauma and cultural conditioning settled into your body? What lies beneath the performance of desire? What becomes possible when sexuality is claimed without apology?

Set in the stunning natural sanctuary of Big Sur, California, this healing workshop creates conditions for deep self-inquiry and embodied transformation. Through guided somatic practices, ritualized movement, and authentic group reflection, you'll investigate the often-hidden gap between what you've been taught to want and what you actually long for. You'll examine inherited armor—the protective patterns that once served you—and explore what fluidity means in movement, fantasy, touch, and human connection. This is not academic work; it is body-centered, consent-driven, and rooted in the understanding that sexuality can be a form of presence, medicine, and sacred expression.

What to Expect

Over this immersive weekend, you'll move through guided somatic practices designed to help you sense where shame and desire live in your body. Finn Deerhart creates an intentional container for exploration—one where all activities remain entirely optional and consent is non-negotiable. Expect authentic group reflection, embodied rituals that move beyond binary thinking, and careful, boundaried touch practices. Partial nudity may occur within the workshop, always with clear safety protocols and full sovereignty over your participation. You'll leave with a deepened relationship to your own embodied desire, tools for reclaiming sexuality as presence, and a felt sense of what becomes possible when you show up without pretense.

Venue & Logistics

This workshop takes place at Esalen Institute in Big Sur, California, a world-renowned retreat center nestled on dramatic coastal cliffs. The event runs Friday, December 11, 2026. Wear comfortable clothing that allows for movement; bring layers and any personal items that support your comfort and grounding. Esalen's stunning grounds, hot springs, and nourishing meals support the healing work of the weekend. For accessibility questions specific to somatic work and touch practices, contact the organizers directly before registering.